Has Anyone Ever Overcome There Stuttering Problem?

[Mandilyn]

I Would just like to know if there is hope for me in overcoming my stuttering problem ?? :(

I am constantly talking to people because I model and its so embarrassing when people ask me my name and I stand there and take so long like Im lying about my name.

Is there anyone on here that used to have a stuttering problem and overcame it??? If so, How??

I am 19 years old, and my stuttering problem is actually getting worse....isnt it supposed to get better the older I get? When I was younger I hardly stuttered!

Does anyone have any advice or how to make it go away? and does anyone know why its getting worse??

Help Please!!

[Asif]

Sorry to hear your problem is getting worse.
I know all too well how it can sound as if you are lying when you hestitate over your own name :)
Fotunately you have a few helpful things going for you...
If you are a model, then you are probably an attractive woman.
Men, especially, are going to naturally want to make allowances for you, especially if you are up-front and honest with them.
Practice being fluent at saying: "Please be patient. I have a speech impediment."
This sentence works wonders. It places responsibility for being patient on the listener. This gives you a more even playing field, and wins you some time. It also delivers a message that you are calm, prepared and honest.
There is NO easy cure for stuttering that can be handed to you.
It has taken me many, many years to get a grip on my speech.
But it IS possible to - maybe not overcome it - successfully learn to tolerate it and live with yourself comfortably.

Stuttering can either ruin your life, or build character like nothing else could.
This is up to you.
Asif.

[Mandilyn]

Thanks for replying Asif!
Yes I do get attention from men a lot but sometimes I wish I didnt, because I dont even want to open my mouth because I stutter.

You have it under control you were saying? How did you get to do that? If you dont mind me asking.
I just atleast want to beable to control it.

If anyone else has controlled there stuttering problem or overcome it, Please reply!

Thanks.

[Asif]

You're welcome.
At your age, stuttering is going to seem like a huge problem and there is little you can do about that. But there is something you can do about how you feel about yourself.
Are you a decent, honest person? Do you have virtues? Do you think you are worth investing yourself in? Let's hope so :)
If you are none of these things, well maybe you should get busy becoming someone you like more.
When you like who you are, then you can begin downplaying the importance of speaking like everyone else.
How sad it must be for everyone else! Always HAVING to talk, talk, talk, just because they CAN :)
What you do not do is breathe easily.
You must learn how to do this.
Go to http://www.tao2000.net and see the TAO page. Or look at the foxes instead :)
As I said: there is no easy answer, but if you are accepting and patient, you can and will make a lot of progress towards fluency, and feeling better about yourself into the bargain :)
Asif.

[Sup2u]

Your lucky you got a job as a model.

[llw03c]

i've actually never seen a female stutterer!!? :confused:

[Mandilyn]

well I wouldnt say Im lucky to be a model, I stutter to much, and I always have to talk, so its embarrassing!

you never seen a female that stuttered? hmm.. is it not common in females?
Oh no, now im left out! :(

Anyone get there stuttering undercontrol?
I know there must be someone out there?


Thanks for the replys

[Professor]

yeah i never knew a female that stuttered either :\

[Mandilyn]

ok new question.
Is there any females on here that stutter???

Im female and I stutter, and I also used to have a female friend that stuttered, but not bad.

My mom kinda does, but she gets it from my grandpa.


Is there any females on her that stutter? or is this just all men?

And has anyone got there stutter under control and how??

[llw03c]

Is there any females on her that stutter? or is this just all men?

actually mandilyn, statistics show that its wwaaaaayy more prevalent in men than women. if only 1% of the population stutters imagine the percentage of women?? i think i've read that 75% or so of all stutterers are male that means that only 0.25% of the population are female stutterers.

a female stutterer, still fascinating...i bet you're still a cutie pie anyway ;)

[Mandilyn]

So that probaly means Im like one of the only girls on here. :(

Thanks barbara for the website link!


Anyone else on here got things under control??


Thanks

[Sup2u]

Stuttering won't just go away. And just because it might have in someone doesn't mean it will go away in all of us. Try focusing less on how to get rid of it and more on how to deal with it. I used to wish and pray for a quick fix solution until I researched and found that there is none. I definately do not want to be dependant on a gadget. Try reading this Mandilyn http://www.stuttering.com/book.html. If not that read Pat's hum technique. I'm sure a successful lady like you will eventually learn to deal with this horrible affliction.

[Morpheus84]

hey!

i know a few stuttering girls, ive been in such a lame ass group therapy which totally doesnt work! but there were a few girls, and they're all sooo gorgeous, you are a model too so maybe only beautiful girls stutter?:P
my stuttering is actually getting worse then it was before (see the reply at the other thread), a period it was completely gone, but now its coming back! :mad: , but the ehmmm technique is indeed quite helpfull, also speaking at a little louder tone can reduce the stuttering.
Isnt it stupid that we all go find techniques like editing out words, substituting, calculating when youre going to stutter, doing humm's, and our brain does that so fast, you immediately know whats the best way to say a scentence thats in your mind, kinda weird??

well cya later
arnout

[Sup2u]

Tecniques do help us cope with our problem.

[yk322]

Marylin Monroe stuttered.
I also know a girl on my block who stutters

[happy7117]

:) How cool is this!!! Not the stuttering, but
a female stutterer..when I went to
speech therapy last year-it did not do a thing..
I met a very attractive girl while at therapy
named Elizabeth, she stuttered(im not
making this up)- and we really got to know each
other well,--I felt like a fool by not getting
her phone number--she had blond hair, and blue eyes-- but she was in high school- and I
was 25 last years old--and she was like 18..
but then again-- I would of hooked up
with her in a flash because we could relates so much to our stuttering..!!! :rolleyes:

I highly reccomend DAF - Delayed Auditory Feedback- what it does is delay the sound of your own voice a fraction of a second before you hear it..
It won't cure it, but it will reduce it..

Oh yes, and it makes me anervouse wreck
when people have to be patient to wait for me stutter on stuff when all I want to do is spit it out..
the listener does not understand me, and plus
i get ignored-- and many times i felt like
i can't live with myself,

Ive been through every therapy imaginable::
breathing exercises, relaxation, DAF,
the only help is an anti-stutter aid with a price
tag i cannot afford-- I get very impatient with myself
to-al i want to do is be coherent!!!!!!!
And i have a very low tolerance for others
having to wait for me to spit it out--

I want them to help me, and finish my sentences---
anything is better than having a listener
wait through an episode of stuttering--and
then the stutterer not know what he just said because he could not even understand himself!!!

[Asif]

There is no easy answer for your affliction. So forget that.
Every stutterer stutters in a different way: none are alike.
Coming to terms with stuttering is going to be a lot of work, in the same way that anything worthwhile is going to take work.
Look at it like training for a doctorate. It takes years.
First you are going to HAVE to re-learn how to breathe.
Don't gloss over this bit: unless you can control how you breathe, you will NEVER be fluent.
And try always to look at the problem in the most positive way possible:
Anything that does not kill us makes us stronger.
Stuttering will either wreck you, or build you into a VERY strong person. Take your pick :)
As for gadgets: you can get exactly the same effect as a delayed feedback gizmo by blocking one ear with your finger.
So try being that weirdo who walks around with one finger stuck in his/her ear.
And get used to the idea that this "training" is going to take your entire life.
You may never be as fluent as you would like, but give it your best and it WILL improve to the point where you can at least live with it.
I know for a fact that if I live in a certain "way", I can be 100% fluent. Unfortunately, this certain "way" of living is not really practical in a western society. So I compromise between fluency and sprituality. Works for me :)
Asif.

[happy7117]

Walking around with a finger in my ear is definately out--!!
Besides I tried that already in the privacy of my apartment,
and it was not the same as a choral effect as DAF provides-
it just blocks out the sound of my voice which supposedly helps
some stuttereres but not me--!! I even got a neighbor of mine to tell me to "you got to learn to relax!!", I felt like punching his...
obviously didn't but I FELT it!! I felt like saying, "what do you
think iv'e been trying to put up with the past 20 years"..
anyway-- no matter how much i pracice breathing, in
public, I really have trouble remembering because my
mind is on what i want to say to someone, not how I have to say
it....anyway, iv'e gone to church and done some praying, but
I am not sure why god had to give me this stutter thing for 20 years..because I cannot live with myself-- i want some
relief-- the outside world is so glib, and fun, and to me it's
the most unfairest thing to be able to not enjoy it because of
the speech thing...my patience has exhausted me for so many years...

[Asif]

OK :)
I remember how it was when I was 20.
I was one dangerous hombre.
Angry doesn't begin to describe it.
You may be able to NOT punch people out, but I often did.
And nobody could tell me anything, nor even suggest anything.
Your ego is going to stop you dead in your tracks every time you try to speak.
But go ahead and discover everything by yourself. I had to.
Sure it's all so unfair. Whoever suggested it wouldn't be?
You feel badder than bad every time you try to speak.
Even remembering my own struggle is painful.
But life is a journey. A very long one.
It takes a long, long time to get anywhere you might want to be.
I'm over 50 now, and it's taken almost that long to become reasonably fluent.
I have bad days. But I look at it more philosophically now.
Maybe tomorrow will be better. And often it is.
May I suggest investigating taoism?
I was always a victim of my emotions until I realised I was never meant to be a christian.
I was in my 40s before I discovered that.
Taoism and breathing are close enough to be almost the same thing.
Maybe you'll discover the real you isn't anything like who you think you are now. And maybe you'll find that life really IS the best.
Asif.

[Tess]

ok new question.
Is there any females on here that stutter???

Im female and I stutter, and I also used to have a female friend that stuttered, but not bad.

My mom kinda does, but she gets it from my grandpa.


Is there any females on her that stutter? or is this just all men?

And has anyone got there stutter under control and how??
I'm a female stutterer. And I don't think I've got my speech under total control, but it is improving lately. I had 3 (different) speech coaches in the past 5/6 years, and my first 2 speech coaches had some influence on my speech, but the last one was the one I really needed for such a long time, because she findely focussed on my fear of stuttering as the other 2 haven't really done that.

[Gary1450]

Like Asif said - breathing is very important.

Breathing is the best therapy I've given myself.

I've been reaserching the web on FISH OIL that helps children with ADHD and other speech disorders - not necessarliy stuttering.

I'm taking a high quality fish oil everyday - I'll let you all know how it works.

[Asif]

hehe :)
Fish Oil Therapy! What a riot!
But it sure helps my aching knee joints, and every little bit helps.
Probably pain has a negative effect on fluency, like anger does. Anything that helps us feel better must surely make us also more fluent.
Asif.

[ysy]

Marilyn, I'm also a female stutterer, and unfortuately can't find a job...so lucky you...

Anyway, Asif, you always promote this breathing technique, but I don't unerstand. If breathing is the important factor then why do severe stutterers sing so well? Surely in order to sing so well you already know breathing techniques, right???

[Asif]

ysy:
Did you, or anyone you know, know how to breathe correctly when you started to sing?
Six year old stutterers can sing. They know nothing of breath control.
I could sing beautifully at a time when I could not put two words together in normal speech. Breathing just didn't happen for me when I tried to talk.
Singing involves a rhythm that speech does not. Somehow there is no fear involved in singing, like there is with speech.
I have said before that when I speak French, I speak fluently. This is because there is a definite rhythm to French, whereas English is very choppy and staccato in comparison. One breathes differently.
Anyway: I don't cl to know what I'm talking about, here.
I'm sharing my many years of real experience in case it helps.
But each of us is going to have to figure it out for ourselves.
There is no magic pill, or quick fix.
Rather, it is down to many, many little discoveries and insights that add up to at least a partial cure.
I still am not reliably fluent. I have very good days, sometimes.
I have rather bad days at other times.
There seems no clear cause as to why this should be, other than that stress very definitely does not help.
And by stress, I mean any kind of stress.
Even ual stress is stress, although it may feel nice.
Breathing is a way to calm the system and get it into a "normal" state rather than a nervously-breathless state in which speech is less likely to be fluent.
Blah blah blah...
Thank you for reading my claptrap :)
Asif.

[superman]

I've read that the Vulsalva Mechanism (the thing that makes you stutter) is not used at all during singing. The brain focuses on melody, phonation, breathing and uses primarly the right hemisphere of the brain. These activities keep the exitement level of valsalva mechanism very low.

Want to talk fluently for a little while, try this. Speak in rithym to something. Background music or white tapping your fingers on something. Notice something piculiar?

[Matthias]

hello i am 15 years old . and one of my problems is like you when saying my name Matthias . It is so embarresing . sometimes people tell me have you forgot your name or some of these stupid comments which make it much worse