speaking on the phone! is it a no no!!!?

[sacha]

i hate it when people phone me (that arn't close friends) cause im like,'' hi, yeah ok g..g..g.g.g..g.g.g t..t. .t..t g..go mow sorry see you ..............................l.l.later'' :mad: :( :( :mad:

anyone have this problem??

[sloth]

Yep. That's why i've learned to hate the phone. I'm not nearly as bad as i used to be, but the phone has never been really nice to me. :rolleyes: I can never say "bye", or "can i take a message", which is what i usually always say anyway.

[llw03c]

yeah, sometimes..depends on what day of the week i suppose.. :rolleyes: i'll say "can i take a mess-ss-aa-sssss-aaagge?" :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

[Tess]

I don't like the phone to, I have created a bad habit now to wait 'till someone else will answer it. If no one does, or when I'm home alone, I know I've gót to answer it, and then I will, but not before I make sure that anyone else could actually answer it. It's just about fear of failing to me again, but it's not really charming when I answer the phone: '......H-h-h-h-hel-hello' And that's just the first word, can you even imagine what the rest will be like? Erm..yeah, not very good.

[Asif]

Hehe:)
I have a great way of dealing with the phone: I don't answer it.
I am the only remaining human in the universe who does not own a mobile.
Same thing with the doorbell: I only answer it if I feel like answering it.
Amazingly - having seen some of the pitiful posts that appear on this forum - I can read, write and spell, so email is my medium of choice.
But having said all that, I can usually get by fine on the phone now.
I do often let the listener know I may have trouble.
And having done that, usually I don't :)
But I do remember times in the past when people would hang up on me before I was able to make a single sound!!!
Asif.

[Gary1450]

I'm at work now - stuttering on the phone all day!

Some calls are better than others.

[AMG]

Talking on the phone helped me alot. I really dont stutter on the phone unless im real excited and then I have blocks. But after 2 or three of the blocks I get back in my rythm. I talk on the cell phone alot and I walk around to keep my body moving. I find sitting down does not help at all. Walking around the house or office keeps you relax.

[Gary1450]

It's funny, I used to just have a hard time making calls - I could answer the phone (not well but I could answer it). Now I have a hard time with both.

That's the thing about stuttering - practice doesn't make perfect. I have the same problem now at age 30 that I had when I was 16.

I worry about losing my job all the time because my speech is worse now then when they first hired me. They were aware of the problem but if they heard me now I might lose my job. I have my own office so I don't have people listening in too much.

[Gary1450]

I had to make a phone call today and leave a message on a person's voice mail.

It sucked pretty bad.

Just thought I'd share.

[kestrel]

I must be lucky.I do not find the phone a problem, provided everybody was out of the room. When I talk in "technique",I've found that I have a 100% temporary fluency,people or no people in the room. But,mind you,it's still hard work.

[ElectricVersion]

I worry about losing my job all the time because my speech is worse now then when they first hired me. They were aware of the problem but if they heard me now I might lose my job. I have my own office so I don't have people listening in too much.

i'm not sure what you're job is, but no one can fire you for stuttering... the Americans with Disabilities Act protects you full on with that stuff. In fact, if you asked them to, they legally have to provide you with whatever it takes to make your phone job easier. that includes electronic devices and such.

to EVERYONE: never fear LOSING your job, getting jobs is hard for us, but once we are employed, we are protected. :) take comfort in that.

[Gary1450]

I appreciate the response ElectricVersion.

[ElectricVersion]

any time! i'm here to help (and be helped!)

[LovinTheSurf]

hey dudes and dudettes.. its the bad calls which make the good calls!!!

[Standingtall]

i'm not sure what you're job is, but no one can fire you for stuttering... the Americans with Disabilities Act protects you full on with that stuff. In fact, if you asked them to, they legally have to provide you with whatever it takes to make your phone job easier. that includes electronic devices and such.

to EVERYONE: never fear LOSING your job, getting jobs is hard for us, but once we are employed, we are protected. :) take comfort in that.
Thanks for bringing this up LTS, Hey Adam, check this.

[Marco]

the phone is something i never use unless im talking to my sister or mother. or if im on the phone with one of them. il try to substatue my words. so no one hears me stutter. i hate living like this it blows.a phone is something everyone needs in there life. regardless.

[Requiem]

I hate having to talk on the phone, that's one of the worst inventions that trigger my stutter to the full. The worst bit is you having to call people especially ordering stuff or even making a doctor's appointment. Usually I get my parents to do that for me but now I get annoyed because I feel I'm just being a wuss. It's funny how a silly little electronic device makes you stutter more than usual and you're not even face to face with that person you're talking to.

[happy7117]

It's funny how a silly little electronic device makes you stutter more than usual

Aren't the devices supposed to make us stutter less instead of more since that is their purpose??..Why would they make us stutter more than normal...??

[happy7117]

I hate having to talk on the phone, that's one of the worst inventions that trigger my stutter to the full. The worst bit is you having to call people especially ordering stuff or even making a doctor's appointment. Usually I get my parents to do that for me but now I get annoyed because I feel I'm just being a wuss. It's funny how a silly little electronic device makes you stutter more than usual and you're not even face to face with that person you're talking to.

I would love to use the phone and would not be apprehensive or afraid to use it..that is if I did not stutter so much....I usualy have my mom order pizza for me or other stuff....

I had tried to order things in the past via phone, and I am so awful sounding I get hung-up of course..and it's humiliatng not being able to talk right on the phone...so my mom does it for me....

I would not call it avoidance if I don't use the phone, but more like assistance for the time being...

If I am unable to use the phone properly, what am I to do??? Do I keep using it in spite of the fact I am totaly misunderstood, or do I let another person make a call for me.....

It's not good to avoid using the phone, but when a stutterer is totaly misunderstood, the stutterer using the phone is not realy an option because he cannot be understood....

And it is indeed embarrasing and humiliating to have another person use the phone for a stutterer when he or she cannot use it themselves..

[bignick]

I am in full agreement with Steve power of Three, I use the phone all day and sometimes I stutter and sometimes I dont. I find I dont stutter as much if I am talking to a woman as I flirt like hell with her and get them on my side more or like Steve inject a bit of humour and let them know you stutter and they should be more patient with you.

Adam,

I wouldnt stop using the phone, dont let the phone become a no no, use it more and hopefully you will become more confident on it. Its like a lot of people say on here, its all about confidence and if you think you will struggle on the phone before hand, then you will.

Keep your chin up and dont let your stutter stop you from living your life.

Take it easy.

Nick

[Standingtall]

I'm in full agreement with the two, Nick and Steven. I take and make many calls a day and now I don't even think about anything when I pick up. I use to be scared to death when the phone rang or I have to make a phone call. I use to get sick to my stomach. Be determined and sooner or later, it will all fall into place.

[Sullebon]

Generally speaking the phone is a no-no for me too. I don't think it's so much the actual talking that is the problem, the problem I have is introducing myself. I have never been able to phone the school to advise of my daughters absence for example, by starting the conversation, Hello, this is...
I seem to be ok(ish) when people phone me. Consequently I have never had an 'office job'

I'd like to add and ask - I have more trouble talking on a mobile phone, than I do a landline - does anyone else experience the same?

Jo

[claragazza]

Generally speaking the phone is a no-no for me too. I don't think it's so much the actual talking that is the problem, the problem I have is introducing myself. I have never been able to phone the school to advise of my daughters absence for example, by starting the conversation, Hello, this is...
I seem to be ok(ish) when people phone me. Consequently I have never had an 'office job'

I'd like to add and ask - I have more trouble talking on a mobile phone, than I do a landline - does anyone else experience the same?

Jo

I do have even more trouble indeed on a mobile phone. I think this is due to two things:
1/ I know that the quality of the sound is lesser so I feel more afraid that people do not understand me, hence more stress and more stutter
2/ People in the street or in the metro hear me speak and they all look at me.

[Standingtall]

I'd like to add and ask - I have more trouble talking on a mobile phone, than I do a landline - does anyone else experience the same?

Jo
I don't recommend using an mobile while driving if you suffer from silent blocks, even if you have an ear piece and mic. Where I live you can use an handsfree mobile, but when i have an silent block, I tend to close my eyes and on a couple occasions, I had to use the brakes or switch lanes real quickly.

I find that I tend to speak better on the mobile, for that one reason, Distractions. I'm looking around, seeing who's watching me or be careful not to walk into a wall that most of my concentration is on other things, then the person on the other line. Strange, but it works for me.

[Jeff99]

the trick to the phone is not to worry about stuttering. whats the first thought when the phone rings? i hope i don't stutterer right. don't think that take a few big breaths first relax ur self the answer the phone taking a fast deep breath only talking at the top of the breath. i learnt this in the McGuire Programm which i took.

[Host of Chaos]

i only talk onmy mobile cos i know wjo is calling me. if i dont know the number theni dont answer it.

[Standingtall]

The only time I don't answer the mobile or land line, if it says unknown name and unknown number. They remain unknown.

[3FingerBrown]

When I was but a young boy and through my college years I spent a lot of time on the phone with friends but had harder times in other situations.

Another time in my life, when I finally got a cell phone I only did so to get rid of my land line. Only problem was that my phone didn't get reception in my apartment and it was such a relief. I had a lair where I didn't have to take any calls or talk to anybody. I could go downstairs to order food or make a call if I needed but I never wanted to take any incoming calls.

Now I've tried to reach out more but I'm yet to really extend beyond my family.

For most situations I don't think I've had a fear of stuttering on the phone, more of a frustration. When the phone rings now I do usually answer it but my first reaction to the phone rihging is still anger.

At work I don't have too much patience on the phone and I only answer calls to my extension. I was orignally forbidden from answering the phone and I didn't mind at all. I'm in a small office and when the customer calls are coming in too fast for the office staff everybody not name Ari is resposnble for helping out on the phone. I've never minded.
When I'm asked to help out by returning a call which is rare, I usually get initially annoyed if not angry. I love email.

I have noticed that in the age of mobile phones people hang up on me a lot more often. When talking to someone for the first time, "You're breaking up" as they prepare to hang up you. That really really boils my blood. Frustration to the 12th degree.

I can say my name, on the phone I can really ease into it... aaaaAAAAAri.
Saying many other things like, "My name is ", any form of hi or hello, the name of whomever I am speaking to or want to speak to, my address, phone number, email address, what I want, these could all be problems depending on the day and situation.
There are times I barely stutter on the phone and there are times I can barely speak on the phone with definitive blocks on anything I could possibly think to say no matter how much I dance. Most of the time its somewhere between. Regardless, answering the phone always frustrates me.

[happy7117]

I was orignally forbidden from answering the phone and I didn't mind at all.

I have always been forbidden to answer the phone at work because of my stutter. It makes me so steamed because I could be a better helper at work than I am now if I could answer the phone..the stutter thing definately gets in my way as far as phones are concerned..I am so mad at the fact it does...but I cope by saying, "with the right treatment the stutter will lessen, not now, maybe not for a long time, but it cannot stay horrendous forever. Do not let myself give into the frusteration and pain it causes. Rise above the pain..think of pain as strength."

[Brian]

i hate it when people phone me (that arn't close friends) cause im like,'' hi, yeah ok g..g..g.g.g..g.g.g t..t. .t..t g..go mow sorry see you ..............................l.l.later'' :mad: :( :( :mad:

anyone have this problem??

The phone is difficult for me, although it has gotten easier. There was a time when I positively would not answer the phone, but now I am a lot less afraid to answer it. To me initiating phone calls are much worse than receiving them (is that true for anyone else?).

But I feel your emotions. You are mad at yourself because you think "Oh my god, what is the matter with me that I cannot even answer a &%^((& phone call?!?". Anger can be a powerful motivator to get you to do something to change this.

I can tell you that the problem you have is "fear" of this situaton. The only way that you will overcome this is to "go through the fear" to get to the other side, no matter how painful it is to you in the moment. You will find that if you face that fear, and keep on facing the fear, it will decrease. The more you face it, the less poweful it becomes. This is the only way to beat it.

So instead of giving up and then getting mad at yourself afterwards, use that anger to stay on the line and force yourself to talk no matter how much trouble you have. It is the path to correction.