Does Stuttering shape personality or visa versa

[Blackbutterfly]

I have often wondered just how much my stuttering has affected my personality. I also wonder how much my personality has affected my stuttering.:confused:

For e.g. a lot of people at my former job see me as an intellectual who knows a lot about everything and always has an opinion. I sometimes stutter very badly among some of these but I feel a greater need to say whats on my mind in the most forceful way I can. I know I have strong leadership abilities and dont like being second fiddle to anyone.

In my personal life, however, I shy away from a lot of speaking situations and have become much more withdrawn in recent times. I will allow some comments to go unchallenged and clam up around certain people. It puzzles me so much.

I wonder who i realy am, a strong assertive leader or a reclusive wallflower, it just doesn't make sense.

Anyone know what Im talking bout:rolleyes:

[Blackbutterfly]

Funny story.....my uncle, father and I were travelling in a car through the Bronx...we all stutter. I was wondering to myself, if we get stopped by the police who would do the talking. When we got to my aunts house, she said the same thing and we all burst out laughing. It's funny the simple things that other people take for granted. Becuase of my stuttering I have such empathy for people with disabilities, my heart aches for them. I guess thats a blessing in my life.

[climberszen]

I am very much the same.... and the forceful issue at work often became an issue. It took me many years to learn that if people did not ask me for my view/opinion that I should keep my mouth shut... I felt I always had to prove myself... instead I was viewed as an arrogant know it all.

Only in the last couple years have I learned to sit back and not get involved, or care... if people want my advice they ask... and I know longer have to prove myself.

[Blackbutterfly]

I am very much the same.... and the forceful issue at work often became an issue. It took me many years to learn that if people did not ask me for my view/opinion that I should keep my mouth shut... I felt I always had to prove myself... instead I was viewed as an arrogant know it all.

Only in the last couple years have I learned to sit back and not get involved, or care... if people want my advice they ask... and I know longer have to prove myself.



Youre right, balance is key. Sometimes I talk too much and try to be "the life of the party" and people think I'm cool , but to be honest I would much rather sit back and be quiet most of the time , but I talk alot sometimes to let other people know that I am not afraid to talk.
I try to be myself most times, but I'm not even sure who that is.

[Standingtall]

Welcome blackbutterfly, good to meet you. You ask a very good question. For myself, it is pretty hard to compare how much it has affected my personality, when i dont know what my personality would have been like it i did not stutter. The only reference i can use are my brothers and sisters. I would say i would be very different. I think it made me a better person, because of the hardships we have to face. The inner person really wants to come out, but the fear and anger, frustrations, teasing, the pain, keeps it down, but there is a conflice as we fight with it. A battle that is constantly going on. Looking forward in what you have to share.

[Blackbutterfly]

Welcome blackbutterfly, good to meet you. You ask a very good question. For myself, it is pretty hard to compare how much it has affected my personality, when i dont know what my personality would have been like it i did not stutter. The only reference i can use are my brothers and sisters. I would say i would be very different. I think it made me a better person, because of the hardships we have to face. The inner person really wants to come out, but the fear and anger, frustrations, teasing, the pain, keeps it down, but there is a conflice as we fight with it. A battle that is constantly going on. Looking forward in what you have to share.



You make a great point. Sometimes I look at my brothers, especially the younger one, and I see in him some of what I wanted to be. It makes me bummed out sometimes. I have always held back from meeting more people, because I was afraid, this probably has cost me a lot of opportunities in my life. I want to be outgoing and upfront in everything, but if I try and have a really bad block it just makes me look stupid. I find that drinking helps, but I dont wanna go there.

[Be YOURSELF]

You are who you choose to be. No one decides for you. Its wise to choose develop a personality that helps you progress in life

[Blackbutterfly]

I've been through a lot because of my speech problem and I usually rise above it. Recently I left a job at a company where I worked for over ten years and was recently promoted again , under protest. People had commented about my stuttering in the past but I wiggled my way around it.
In the latest incident the secretary of my senior boss told her that she couldnt understand a word I said in meetings and that she would not be able to work with me. I was a supervisor at the time and my immidiate boss or staff had no probs with me, but this senior boss started talking shit to everyone around me and bringing me down . I gave in to the negativity along with other reasons and resigned. I regret doing it now and feel so ashamed and worthless for quitting.
I fought so hard to prove myself and failed myself in the end. We all have our breaking point and in my moment of weakness I gave in.
Please be yourselves in whatever you do and dont ever give up on anything. Live life by your terms as much as you can

[Manofsteel18765]

I think it made me a better person, because of the hardships we have to face. The inner person really wants to come out, but the fear and anger, frustrations, teasing, the pain, keeps it down, but there is a conflice as we fight with it. A battle that is constantly going on. Looking forward in what you have to share.

I know my stuttering has given me empathy. At this point in my life, I am happy with who I am. I know that I am a good person and try to give back to others.
But I just thought about it, we are our own worst enemy and I think it is what traps us within ourselves. We are so worried about trying to speak perfectly and locked within ourselves, that we don't really see an accurate picture of how the worlds sees us. Instead we project our feelings of ourselves on others and deem that they must feel the same way about us as we do ourselves. But most of the time, it is opposite of what we think. So relax a little, and love yourself. You only get one shot at life, might as well have fun.

[longwindingroad]

I have often wondered just how much my stuttering has affected my personality. I also wonder how much my personality has affected my stuttering.:confused:

For e.g. a lot of people at my former job see me as an intellectual who knows a lot about everything and always has an opinion. I sometimes stutter very badly among some of these but I feel a greater need to say whats on my mind in the most forceful way I can. I know I have strong leadership abilities and dont like being second fiddle to anyone.

In my personal life, however, I shy away from a lot of speaking situations and have become much more withdrawn in recent times. I will allow some comments to go unchallenged and clam up around certain people. It puzzles me so much.

I wonder who i realy am, a strong assertive leader or a reclusive wallflower, it just doesn't make sense.

Anyone know what Im talking bout:rolleyes:



I know what you're talking about.

If a person is stuck with a stutter, I think it's a better fit for a shy/introverted person. Having a stutter is not such a good fit for an outgoing/extroverted person. Here, you've got to hold back quite a bit.

My personality is all over the place. Sometimes I have to hold back, because I want to talk in social situations. Other times I want to run to the nearest exit.

[Blackbutterfly]

I know what you're talking about.

If a person is stuck with a stutter, I think it's a better fit for a shy/introverted person. Having a stutter is not such a good fit for an outgoing/extroverted person. Here, you've got to hold back quite a bit.

My personality is all over the place. Sometimes I have to hold back, because I want to talk in social situations. Other times I want to run to the nearest exit.





You are exactly right. Is this what happens to everyone, you think, or mainly to us PWS!

[longwindingroad]

You are exactly right. Is this what happens to everyone, you think, or mainly to us PWS!



In the romance department, lots of non-stutterers hold back. People hold back, because they may be rejected. It does hurt, but the person may be rejecting you because you're not their type.

Wearing leather and having a whip in your hand may be their type. A few! Maybe more than I think.