new and need some advice :S

[chiaz]

Hi everyone I'm new here :) My name is Sarah and I'm 18. Ive been stuttering now for just about my whole life, I went to therapy when i was about 6 and it seemed to have went away for about 4 years and then it came back, but i just ignored it and thought it would go away and it definatly didn't. In highschool it wasnt so bad because I worked around presentations. But now that I'm in college (graphic design program) it has been a complete living HELL! :( . Its requried to take a communications couse in order to graduate - and i'm in the class right now. Basically the class is all presentations and speaches. I've only attemped to make one speach, at the begining of the semester and it was just a living nightmare .. i went into it with all the confidence in the world and blew it. I couldnt even get it done i was soo bad i couldnt even say the words, i think i said about 3 i completly embarssed myself infront of my whole class and teacher I was humilated but i tried not to show it. Ive been putting off talking to pretty much anyone since then, my confidence has dropped alot - but i try so hard. My teacher is understanding but he is also at the point where he is frustrated because he can't pass me when i dont do the required work (the speaches) but he also knows i can't control it. He usually talks to me after class and talks me through the speach .. and we sub in words that are easier for me to say but even at that it doesnt turn out good .. usually after class all i can do is go to the washroom and cry, i feel soo different and i dont know what to do :confused: , i hate stuttering - if i had one wish in the world it would be to make it dissappear!

I am glad i found this forum though..I'm starting to feel like I'm not alone any more.

[llw03c]

aaawwww..poor sarah, you need a hug.. ;) . you're not alone at all as is evident by the number of people we have on this forum. it really isn't fair that people have to go through this. i don't know who to blame for this. why did god create something such as a stutter?? no one cares about stutterers. everyone has sympathy for other disabilities but not for us. :mad:

seriously, not to tease you or anything, but my college has the same requirement as yours but by some stroke of brilliant luck, there was some bug in the computer system i believe and it showed that my speech class requirement had been met even though i hadn't taken a speech class. for my 4 years it went undetected and my BS degree was granted without having made a single speech in any class. i had dodged a serious bullet (actually, more like a missile). then i went to grad school and had to make presentations and for some reason, whenever i'm really nervous and my voice trembles, my stutter disappears.

now i'm out of school and dealing with the harsh realities of life for a recent grad. i've had job interviews so far. i'm guilty of word substitution so sometimes communication skills appear to be lacking. needless to say i don't have a job. its a real shame as i feel as if there is so much talent and potential locked inside me and no one will ever know since they can't get past my problem. there are tons of other job applicants who don't stutter so whey hire me, right?? even if i cl to possess tons of skills, all of it is negated by the fact that i just can't speak fluently. its been several months since graduation and i've also lost confidence. its not getting any bette either. right now i really don't know what to do. i don't want to relegate myself to some menial career just to avoid speaking 'cause then my stuttering would have won and i WILL NOT LET IT WIN.

so on to some advice: even though i didn't take a speech class, i did have to defend my thesis for the MS degree. what i did was similar to what you did i suppose. the key thing is knowing your strengths and weaknesses. i know word subsititution is frowned upon and everyone says to accept you stutter but that is the single most difficult thing in the world for me to do as i'm a covert stutterer.

what i did was recognize that i was in control of the words that will be used in the presentation. with this in mind, the night before the presentation, i planned my speech out word for word and avoided using words that i believed would have been tough for me to say. then i rehed the entire thing in my head a couple of times; i visualized. this is extremely important. i play sports and sometimes when you visualize things before, they are easier to execute because on some level of consiousness you have experienced the desired outcome already. in your case, the desired outcome is a stutter free speech so you have to visualize yourself making this speech with the "nice" words throughout. practice this visualization. don't dwell on the outcome or what people will say or the grade, or the professor or whatever. just concentrate on the visualization.

i hope this helps and i wish i could make your problem go away but i can't..but you have to try. good luck.

[PatientPrsvrnce]

Sarah, I'm really sorry to hear of your situation in your speech class. I have had the same problems as you have had and I have a few tips that might help you in the short term

1) Try Yoga before your class. I'm a big fan of Yoga, because the only reason I tried it, was to battle stuttering and it has helped. Try the Yoga for dummies DVD, and go through the entire exercise

2) Walk with a confident attitude. Picture yourself giving a brilliant speech...(similiar to the visualization that the previous person had mentioned here. Walk with your shoulders up and be in a positive frame of mind

3) Chew gum before your class. This helps with the oxygen flow. Sounds a little silly...but it helps.

The biggest thing is really for you to believe in yourself...you will not be perfect, but this takes a lot of work. Good luck Sarah....let us know how it goes after your next speech. Were all here for you!

[alok daga]

Hi everyone I'm new here :) My name is Sarah and I'm 18. Ive been stuttering now for just about my whole life, I went to therapy when i was about 6 and it seemed to have went away for about 4 years and then it came back, but i just ignored it and thought it would go away and it definatly didn't. In highschool it wasnt so bad because I worked around presentations. But now that I'm in college (graphic design program) it has been a complete living HELL! :( . Its requried to take a communications couse in order to graduate - and i'm in the class right now. Basically the class is all presentations and speaches. I've only attemped to make one speach, at the begining of the semester and it was just a living nightmare .. i went into it with all the confidence in the world and blew it. I couldnt even get it done i was soo bad i couldnt even say the words, i think i said about 3 i completly embarssed myself infront of my whole class and teacher I was humilated but i tried not to show it. Ive been putting off talking to pretty much anyone since then, my confidence has dropped alot - but i try so hard. My teacher is understanding but he is also at the point where he is frustrated because he can't pass me when i dont do the required work (the speaches) but he also knows i can't control it. He usually talks to me after class and talks me through the speach .. and we sub in words that are easier for me to say but even at that it doesnt turn out good .. usually after class all i can do is go to the washroom and cry, i feel soo different and i dont know what to do :confused: , i hate stuttering - if i had one wish in the world it would be to make it dissappear!

I am glad i found this forum though..I'm starting to feel like I'm not alone any more.

hi sarah, never feel that u r the only one having problems out here. we all have faced similar situations as u have just mentioned. as others have posted, u will need to do a few exercises bfore making a speech in front of an audience. firstly, practice deep breathing - whenever u r free just take deep breaths and repeat this for a couple of minutes. secondly, hav control over ure mind - assume that u never had this problem and are very much like the others....this impediment is mainly due to psychological factors. u need to play sports and shout at the top of ure voice whenever u feel like. confront ure impediment and take it head on....u will need to talk to any tom, and harry and take up a topic - be it at the bus stop, train, air plane...i mean anywhere. dont try to dodge or substitute words...u will have to use all the words as it is either by splitting them up or by slowing down as u use them.....never ever try to force yourself thru sentences...u better b slow rather than being fast and being made to repeat them as ppl dont understand what u said...mail me at alok.daga@wipro.com if u need to get in touch again. and yeah keep smiling

[Gary1450]

Sarah-

I know how you feel. College was hard for me. One time I had to recite a Shakespeare speech in front of 50 students. I worried about it all semester but I got through it.

ALthough there are no drugs to cure stuttering I found that there are drugs that can help you control it if you feel that your anxiety or feelings of panic are making your speech worse.

Once in a while I take Inderal (beta-blocker for blood pressure also used for public speaking). It helps reduce the adrenaline rush while speaking. Of course you have to get a presciption for it.

It's only good for public speaking for me, not everyday speaking. Just a thought. It might do nothing for you.

[ElectricVersion]

My teacher is understanding but he is also at the point where he is frustrated because he can't pass me when i dont do the required work (the speaches) but he also knows i can't control it.

Thanks for sharing your story Sarah, I too have felt some of these exact same things. And yes, if I had one wish as well, you know what I would do with it, as would most everyone on this forum probably.

Thing is... You can't be failed for a disability. You are not shy, or lazy, you have a disability. You can't fail someone in a wheelchair in Physical Education, You can't fail a blind kid for failing to copy notes from the board because they can't see them. Teachers/professors work around things. Perhaps give you a paper to write on the fundamentals of speech giving/public speaking, to show that you know HOW to give proper speeches.

I think the fact that you make attempts, even though you are terrified is merit enough to pass with flying colors. The fact that you work with your teacher on the speeches and continue to try is awesome. I have a feeling you put in more than twice the effort that most of the other students put in in the class. Talk to your teacher about your concerns and make sure they address your speech as a real, tried and true disability. cause that's what it is.

it's common talk to say that no one cares about stutters, and socially, it definitely seems true, but the laws that protect people with disabilities applies 100% to speech impediments, stuttering included.

don't fool yourself, you have rights, and as long as you are putting in the work at school, you can not and should not be failed over a disability. it's literally unconstitutional. :)

- kip

[mos]

hello sarah

just would like to say that i agree with what everyone above me have posted.

take care

:cool:

[peikayla]

hey sarah,
My name is Kayla MacLean and i am 17.
I excepted my stuttering about 10 months ago due to my Best friend and music teacher Kirk White. He helped me throught it and all my teachers also understand but I have to still do presentations. At the beginning of every year in every class I expain what stuttering is and that I would like it if they would be patient. they understand and the ones that don't get booed and stuff LOL. anyway hope I can help sometime. I wanted to be a graphic designer but now I want to be a Instrumental music teacher. Check out my website and tell me anything I should add www.stutteringsupport.piczo.com