Do yall approach girls?

[CTre]

Do yall approach random females that you want to talk to? If so how does it go, and any words of advice?

[Nicholas]

If they really care about whom you, rather than what you are, they will be more willing to adapt.

High school and all school in general is a small part of your life, you will only be there for a few more years then you won’t see any of those people again. That alone should be your excuse for not worrying about stuttering around peers in public. But if they understand your difficulties, all the better.

As for your question: I do approach girls when I find it necessary. There is a girl that's been eyeing me, but we've only had brief conversations and our friendship hasn't evolved. I can only offer you the advice that's helped me: Act as smart as you are and don't try to hide the fact that you're different. And, especially, don't take crap from nobody.

[Gary1450]

If I never met my wife I know I would still be single to this day becasue of my stuttering.

The idea of calling a girl on the phone or introducing myself (at least in my twenties) was insane.

[llw03c]

Do yall approach random females that you want to talk to? If so how does it go, and any words of advice?
i've approached random girls before a number of times. my stuttering was never in question. its always what i was going to say, that was of more concern. as such, i'm usually fluent when i go over there. i've found that talking to random girls in public or wherever, has a low success rate anyway. most of the time, they weren't expecting you to come talk to them so they're caught off guard and don't react well even if they might think you're cute or something...best way is to network your way to a gf. grocery stores are overrated.

[CTre]

i've approached random girls before a number of times. my stuttering was never in question. its always what i was going to say, that was of more concern. as such, i'm usually fluent when i go over there. i've found that talking to random girls in public or wherever, has a low success rate anyway. most of the time, they weren't expecting you to come talk to them so they're caught off guard and don't react well even if they might think you're cute or something...best way is to network your way to a gf. grocery stores are overrated.

After you approach them you just have to be confident and funny to open them up.. lol I know this from but thats a different subject.. my probelm is going over there and approaching them

[llw03c]

After you approach them you just have to be confident and funny to open them up.. lol I know this from but thats a different subject.. my probelm is going over there and approaching them
us guys always like to think we have so much control over the situation and that we can manipulate the girl or "pick her up".. but in reality it comes down to if she likes you or not. all you have to do if she likes you is just be yourself. if you have to do all that learned confident or funny or y stuff, even if it does work, then that is what she would be falling for, not your true nature. eventually you'll run out of things to say and you'll come off as fake.

you can go up to as many girls as you want but in reality its a low percentage method; inevitably, she has a bf, or doesn't like the way you look, or the speech thing, whatever. your best bet is to make as many friends as possible. this way, you can combine your looks with personality. when you approach someone in public, basically they'll judge you only on looks.

[godmir]

us guys always like to think we have so much control over the situation and that we can manipulate the girl or "pick her up".. but in reality it comes down to if she likes you or not. all you have to do if she likes you is just be yourself. if you have to do all that learned confident or funny or y stuff, even if it does work, then that is what she would be falling for, not your true nature. eventually you'll run out of things to say and you'll come off as fake.

you can go up to as many girls as you want but in reality its a low percentage method; inevitably, she has a bf, or doesn't like the way you look, or the speech thing, whatever. your best bet is to make as many friends as possible. this way, you can combine your looks with personality. when you approach someone in public, basically they'll judge you only on looks.


True that.

Respect.

BTW i never have approaced girls before.

Out of context now, I realised we stutter mostly because of what we have in our heads and once we can control out thoughs we could get better at stammering less or maybe stop altogether.

This is my theory that i have come up with so far. I am 19 by the way. IT might change as i get older but as of yet this is what "my jounney" has led me to believe.

[llw03c]

True that.

Respect.

BTW i never have approaced girls before.

Out of context now, I realised we stutter mostly because of what we have in our heads and once we can control out thoughs we could get better at stammering less or maybe stop altogether.

This is my theory that i have come up with so far. I am 19 by the way. IT might change as i get older but as of yet this is what "my jounney" has led me to believe.
what we need is organize our thoughts in a logical manner/sequence. us stutterers think about what we say and how we're saying it at the same time whereas ordinary people only think about what they are saying.

going up to girls is a lot of fun...especially when you see the look on their faces when they realize your intentions. if anything, the encounters make good stories for telling your friends. :cool: i've had a few so far..unsuccessful, but at least i don't get that empty feeling when you don't even try in the first place. still, i prefer meeting girls through other avenues.

[CTre]

Yea I'ma start approaching them more often.. I'm tired of having that empty feeling from not approaching :|

[Matthias]

no one is perfect in the world so no one should have a girl ? i dont give a dam about my stuttering when speaking to a girl . if she does not like it just leave me . but just dont tell me you left me cause of my stuttering because it frustrates me .

The most funny and unbelievable thing is that when i tell a girl that sometimes i stattter they all say that they did not realise about it .

[eddgreen]

I have never had a girlfriend and in 56 now
I dare not talk
Its so hard and upsetting
not easy

[Flash]

Do yall approach random females that you want to talk to? If so how does it go, and any words of advice?

I don't. Never had a girlfriend to this day. Just too scared to approach them. Even if i meet a girl through some other way (ex. a friend, classmate, etc.) i'm still to scared cuz I don't know what to even say. Basically you could just say that I have "no game" as we like to say in the U.S. It's so upsetting cuz college girls are way too damn fine. Seriously, anywhere you look, theres bound to be atleast 3 gorgeous ones and and a lot more that aren't as good looking, but still damn hot.

The idea of calling a girl on the phone or introducing myself (at least in my twenties) was insane.

I'd be lucky if I could even get to the call part.

The most funny and unbelievable thing is that when i tell a girl that sometimes i stattter they all say that they did not realise about it .

It seems to me like they were probably lying, but I may be wrong. When I don't even feel or think that i'm stuttering, many other people still say that I do which is confusing. Maybe when those situations happen, it's just so small, that i've gotten used to it, for me to not notice it anymore. Wish I had more of these types of situations though cuz usually when I stutter, you could see it a mile away.

[Bobby]

if i'm drunk, at a party, then yes, i would. otherwise no.

[happy7117]

;)

Agreed there are so many gorgeous
young ladies out here--- and I am a very outgoing
person and I love going out- but if I could talk right I would of had a women 15 years ago...!!!

Pi**es me off--I do love checkeing out hooters
girls but im afraid to talk to them because of
the stutter bug that gets in the way....

For christs sake- Ive been to too many
"useless therapies" with no lasting succes!!

With the right DAF aide or the fluency master which i would love to purchase, i could be very fluent
sounding--- but Im going insane...

Very good friend of mine said "spit it out"!!!

That's a first from a dear friend for years
now...

And what's all this balongne about stuttering not being able to be cured...!!!!!

We all have heard of DAF, FAF-- and not stuttering
when speaking along with someone else!!!

All we need is DAF/FAF every single day of our lives--
it's called listening to that other voice in our ear....

As long as we can hear another speaking along with us-- we will not stutter--- so we need a permenent
DAF aid that will not break or crash--that's the cure...

Oh yeah-- Deaf ones get hearing aids!!
Blind people get canes and assistance from others!!
Aids has a new treatment I heard--
What's up with stutterers get nothing!!
It's B.S

Sorry when Im PO'd, I curse!!!

Been through all treatments available but the only sure fire way to earn my decrease in stuttering
is the proper DAF aide-

Im not willing to live through this garbage
and nonsense much longer-
nothing his happening---

If i had a dollar for every time I got mocked
or recieved a retarded comment reguarding the incoherent crap- i would be rich--!!

Then I could afford a hitman and have him beat up all the people who dared to make fun of me!!!!

[Flash]

happy7117.....I know your not happy (no pun intended :)) about your speech and how it costs too much to get treatment. You've been talking about speech aids/devices in a couple of different threads. I wasn't even sure which to reply in, but I figured it would be best for me to do it here, since the other one is about taking various drugs to reduce stuttering.

Agreed there are so many gorgeous
young ladies out here--- and I am a very outgoing
person and I love going out- but if I could talk right I would of had a women 15 years ago...!!!

Pi**es me off--I do love checkeing out hooters
girls but im afraid to talk to them because of
the stutter bug that gets in the way....
Kinda the same senario, but with girls at college. There's so many gorgeous ones, it's unbelieveable. Now of course, most probably do already have a boyfriend anyways, but not all and there is always the chance they could break up. I like to talk to people and go out and have fun with friends, but I limit myself so so many times because of the stuttering issue.

For christs sake- Ive been to too many
"useless therapies" with no lasting succes!!
I haven't gone to a lot, but the ones I went to in the public school system didn't help me. The private ones didn't help either, but I only went to them a few times because it started to cost too much.

Very good friend of mine said "spit it out"!!!

That's a first from a dear friend for years
now...
People have told me that too sometimes. Makes me literally want to spit at them :D but then they'd probably punch me.

With the right DAF aide or the fluency master which i would love to purchase, i could be very fluent
sounding--- but Im going insane...

And what's all this balongne about stuttering not being able to be cured...!!!!!

We all have heard of DAF, FAF-- and not stuttering
when speaking along with someone else!!!

All we need is DAF/FAF every single day of our lives--
it's called listening to that other voice in our ear....

As long as we can hear another speaking along with us-- we will not stutter--- so we need a permenent
DAF aid that will not break or crash--that's the cure...

Been through all treatments available but the only sure fire way to earn my decrease in stuttering
is the proper DAF aide-

Im not willing to live through this garbage
and nonsense much longer-
nothing his happening---
This topic was brought up at an NSA support group meeting I went to. Two people there said they had bought it. They said they paid $6000 for the SpeechEasy device. They said that at first it did help them out, but that after a couple of months, their brain or something got too used to it that it didn't help them out any longer. They definetely wanted that 6 grand back.:) I really wanted to ask them if i could borrow one of theirs and see how it works, but I thought that it probably wouldn't be the correct thing to do, so I didn't say anything.


Oh yeah-- Deaf ones get hearing aids!!
Blind people get canes and assistance from others!!
Aids has a new treatment I heard--
What's up with stutterers get nothing!!
It's B.S

Sorry when Im PO'd, I curse!!!
Deaf and/or Hard of Hearing people DO NOT get hearing aids for free just like that! They cost just about the same, if not even higher, as the SpeechEasy and other devices you mentioned.

Blind people are not required by law to have a white cane. They can choose if they want to have one. They typically don't want assistance from others, unless they ask for it. I remember watching on T.V. that a doctor had developed a special procedure that could help blind people see, but only in black and white. I dunno all the details, but the doctor would place a computer chip in the person's brain. The person then would have to carry around a small computer with them and wear a special set of glasses attached to the computer. I don't remember how much they said the whole entire thing costs, but I can only guess that it would be somewhere well over $100,000.

What's this about a new AIDS treatment?

If i had a dollar for every time I got mocked
or recieved a retarded comment reguarding the incoherent crap- i would be rich--!!

Then I could afford a hitman and have him beat up all the people who dared to make fun of me!!!!

Me too! My mom mocks me all the time....I especially try my hardest not to stutter around her because if I do, I'll never hear the end of it until the next day.

The stuff you covered in your other post was pretty much the same stuff, just worded differently, so it would be just a waste of time and space (and I've used up a lot of space already :)) to comment on them. For anyone who wants to see his other post, you can click here! (http://www.stutteringforum.com/forums/showthread.php?p=1243#post1243)

[Andrew]

I'll approach girls if I feel I have something to say. I don't approach them about relationships or anything like that becuase I'm always scared of rejection so I let them approach me that way. I used to get really nervous talking to girls, but I noticed it made me feel better if I imagined them as guys (don't laugh... lol; ok u can now) and I wouldnt be nervous.

Usually when I talk to them its about something school related (if we happen to be in school). My girlfriend seems to have a small stuttering problem which makes me feel better about talking to her, but I think her problem was caused by her excessive drug use... while I was just born with it.