New Year....New Hope ???

[Stevelaz]

Another Christmas is over and a New Year is about to begin, and to many stutterers and indeed many fluent people it's a time for new hope....they think "maybe this year will be different" or "I will be fluent in 2009" etc etc.

HOWEVER Jan 1st is the same as EVERY other day and we dont have to wait for a specific day to improve our speech or our situations, TODAY is as good a day as any other day.

The problem with New Year resolutions is that they are setting people up for faliure....I mean, how many diets have started on Jan 1st and failed in a few days/weeks down the road, it puts too much pressure on people...how many times, as stutterers have you gone to bed on New Year eve and hoped to wake up fluent?, and then been undone with your first H H H Happy New Year?

WHAT we need is HABITUAL changes that start when YOU are ready to do so.......you cant MAKE someone change, they have to be ready to do so themselves.

Think about how much work stuttering causes you, the constant scanning ahead for alternative words, the aviodance techniques you use, the physical strain in getting the words out, the anxiety caused, BUT still we, on the whole, do little to RESOLVE our problems.......if we put in an equal amount of effort to resolve our problem as we do to perpetuate it, we would be eloquent speakers by now.

2009 will NOT be the year of pagoclone, Phase IIB trials start in March, so even if the drug "works" it wont be around until 2010/2011, and even then its not a cure, it will help some sub groups, but it will not cure you.....you stop taking the pill and you still stutter just as before........only YOU can help YOU.

I am also wary of taking amino acids and affecting the delicate balance that our brains have, i.e. 5-htp or GABA without medical supervision....they may offer some temporary relief or even a placebo effect, but the brain is not a place for an amateur to be messing with.

Devices, well they may work for some, not for most and still its not a cure, its just a band-aid and you are not making any long lasting habitiual changes.

SO..........make 2009 the year for change but dont put too much pressure on yourself expecting fluency, for eloquence.....there are not many 100% fluent speakers in the world, most people have some bumbles and blips along the way, so dont beat yourself up if you slip up occasionally..........why dont you start TODAY, or TOMMOROW or Jan 2nd.....whenever suits YOU, but you must make HABITUAL changes that will last.

Breathing - start the day with breathing exercises - best thing is that its also FREE....

Resist Time Pressure - dont feel rushed to speak - also FREE !

Eye Contact - get your head up and look people in the eye - dont hide away and feel ashamed,.....it will help.....and guess what, its FREE as well !

Formulate the words in your mind before saying them and eliminate all fillers, tricks and starters, well, erms, actually's etc........

Push out your boundaries - make phonecalls to hotels/restaurants/shops and ask for things.....opening times, locations etc and the go out on the streets and ask for directions/time etc....your confidence will grow.....and yeah, this ones FREE as well.......

Turn off your computer and pick up the phone........most stutterers think that fluent people think they are stupid and that they laugh at you all the time....its not true.....most people are actually quite nice and dont care about our speech.....

Be POSITIVE......its amazing how much this will help.......if we keep whining and moaning it rubs off and the downward spiral continues......BREAK STATE and think positive......if you have a bad speaking experience, its gone, no need to keep hold of it and dwell on it.....let it go people.......

People may say, I've tried this and it does not work........you may well have tried the above or some of it, BUT for how long?.....a day...a week.....a month?......then what......lets give up and go back to my stuttering-self?........it takes commitment.....commit to it.

Have a great holiday and New Year and lets work hard at beating this thing

[Asif]

Nice post: sound advice: positive attitude.
Now if I had posted that...
:)

[Adrian]

Nice post: sound advice: positive attitude.
Now if I had posted that...
:)

You would never have posted that. Steve's post contained concrete steps to improve one's life and speech. Your post's contain meaningless psycho-babble with implied promises of fluency.

[Adrian]

You would never have posted that. Steve's post contained concrete steps to improve one's life and speech. Your post's contain meaningless psycho-babble with implied promises of fluency.

My apologies for the above post. I do not want to hijack Steve's thread.

[Asif]

My apologies for the above post. I do not want to hijack Steve's thread.

And yet, like Pavlov's dog, you salivate on command.
As do a very few others whenever they see my name.

[TenaciousD]

Another Christmas is over and a New Year is about to begin, and to many stutterers and indeed many fluent people it's a time for new hope....they think "maybe this year will be different" or "I will be fluent in 2009" etc etc.

HOWEVER Jan 1st is the same as EVERY other day and we dont have to wait for a specific day to improve our speech or our situations, TODAY is as good a day as any other day.

The problem with New Year resolutions is that they are setting people up for faliure....I mean, how many diets have started on Jan 1st and failed in a few days/weeks down the road, it puts too much pressure on people...how many times, as stutterers have you gone to bed on New Year eve and hoped to wake up fluent?, and then been undone with your first H H H Happy New Year?

WHAT we need is HABITUAL changes that start when YOU are ready to do so.......you cant MAKE someone change, they have to be ready to do so themselves.

Think about how much work stuttering causes you, the constant scanning ahead for alternative words, the aviodance techniques you use, the physical strain in getting the words out, the anxiety caused, BUT still we, on the whole, do little to RESOLVE our problems.......if we put in an equal amount of effort to resolve our problem as we do to perpetuate it, we would be eloquent speakers by now.

2009 will NOT be the year of pagoclone, Phase IIB trials start in March, so even if the drug "works" it wont be around until 2010/2011, and even then its not a cure, it will help some sub groups, but it will not cure you.....you stop taking the pill and you still stutter just as before........only YOU can help YOU.

I am also wary of taking amino acids and affecting the delicate balance that our brains have, i.e. 5-htp or GABA without medical supervision....they may offer some temporary relief or even a placebo effect, but the brain is not a place for an amateur to be messing with.

Devices, well they may work for some, not for most and still its not a cure, its just a band-aid and you are not making any long lasting habitiual changes.

SO..........make 2009 the year for change but dont put too much pressure on yourself expecting fluency, for eloquence.....there are not many 100% fluent speakers in the world, most people have some bumbles and blips along the way, so dont beat yourself up if you slip up occasionally..........why dont you start TODAY, or TOMMOROW or Jan 2nd.....whenever suits YOU, but you must make HABITUAL changes that will last.

Breathing - start the day with breathing exercises - best thing is that its also FREE....

Resist Time Pressure - dont feel rushed to speak - also FREE !

Eye Contact - get your head up and look people in the eye - dont hide away and feel ashamed,.....it will help.....and guess what, its FREE as well !

Formulate the words in your mind before saying them and eliminate all fillers, tricks and starters, well, erms, actually's etc........

Push out your boundaries - make phonecalls to hotels/restaurants/shops and ask for things.....opening times, locations etc and the go out on the streets and ask for directions/time etc....your confidence will grow.....and yeah, this ones FREE as well.......

Turn off your computer and pick up the phone........most stutterers think that fluent people think they are stupid and that they laugh at you all the time....its not true.....most people are actually quite nice and dont care about our speech.....

Be POSITIVE......its amazing how much this will help.......if we keep whining and moaning it rubs off and the downward spiral continues......BREAK STATE and think positive......if you have a bad speaking experience, its gone, no need to keep hold of it and dwell on it.....let it go people.......

People may say, I've tried this and it does not work........you may well have tried the above or some of it, BUT for how long?.....a day...a week.....a month?......then what......lets give up and go back to my stuttering-self?........it takes commitment.....commit to it.

Have a great holiday and New Year and lets work hard at beating this thing


I agree with asif here....... this is very sound, practical advice....I like it.... 2009 is deffinately the year for hope........ Hardwork, practical strategies, and perseverance....... and our hopes will turn into reality:)
PS...........Long live President Obama..... He is also a man who has the audacity to hope!;)

[sst]

You would never have posted that. Steve's post contained concrete steps to improve one's life and speech. Your post's contain meaningless psycho-babble with implied promises of fluency.

Also, don't forget, the bigotry and pretentiousness. :)

Steve is like the polar opposite of Asif/Hans. He is a good person with knowledge that we should all adapt to our lives. Asif/Hans has knowledge we should all be afraid of. ;)

[Asif]

Also, don't forget, the bigotry and pretentiousness. :)

Steve is like the polar opposite of Asif/Hans. He is a good person with knowledge that we should all adapt to our lives. Asif/Hans has knowledge we should all be afraid of. ;)

You see what you want to see.
I do not like homoual behaviour. How exactly does that make me a bigot?
It means I have thought about it, experienced it even, and decided I don't like it.
There are a good many things you don't like.
Does that make you a bigot too?

And because you admit I have knowledge, and admit to being afraid of it, does that mean that nobody else should be allowed to read it and decide for themselves?

You seem dangerously close to being what you call a bigoted fascist.
It seems there are only two of you now that still can't see that.

[nate]

i thought u guys said u WOULDN'T hijack steves thread???:mad:
what happened cabrones???

Steve...great thread and a happy new year to u too.

[sst]

Yes we did hijack his thread. But, I think Steve is a kindred spirit of all the tolerant people here.

[Moh1991]

On December 31, 2007 at around 11 pm
I was praying to god that I wish to become fluent in 2008
2008 is almost over but still stuttering
hopefully 2009 will be different for all of us and we will become fluent if we really believe in ourselves and are willing to work hard

[Stevelaz]

Finally......it looks like the "prophet" Asif has been banned.....now maybe we can get on to some proper advice rather than the psyco-babble that he was pushing.....

Let's start making some changes

[sst]

Finally......it looks like the "prophet" Asif has been banned.....now maybe we can get on to some proper advice rather than the psyco-babble that he was pushing.....

Let's start making some changes

Steve, don't stay away for so long! :)

[John Woo]

Also, don't forget, the bigotry and pretentiousness. :)

Steve is like the polar opposite of Asif/Hans. He is a good person with knowledge that we should all adapt to our lives. Asif/Hans has knowledge we should all be afraid of. ;)


I agree with you. Steve is a good guy. He always offers us good advices and I learn much from his threads. I will just say 'Thank you':D

[Bill Hargis]

This forum is for help, encouragement, advice and ideas. Some one like ASIF spewing his hatred and bigotry really ruins it.

[agantx]

Another Christmas is over and a New Year is about to begin, and to many stutterers and indeed many fluent people it's a time for new hope....they think "maybe this year will be different" or "I will be fluent in 2009" etc etc.

HOWEVER Jan 1st is the same as EVERY other day and we dont have to wait for a specific day to improve our speech or our situations, TODAY is as good a day as any other day.

The problem with New Year resolutions is that they are setting people up for faliure....I mean, how many diets have started on Jan 1st and failed in a few days/weeks down the road, it puts too much pressure on people...how many times, as stutterers have you gone to bed on New Year eve and hoped to wake up fluent?, and then been undone with your first H H H Happy New Year?

WHAT we need is HABITUAL changes that start when YOU are ready to do so.......you cant MAKE someone change, they have to be ready to do so themselves.

Think about how much work stuttering causes you, the constant scanning ahead for alternative words, the aviodance techniques you use, the physical strain in getting the words out, the anxiety caused, BUT still we, on the whole, do little to RESOLVE our problems.......if we put in an equal amount of effort to resolve our problem as we do to perpetuate it, we would be eloquent speakers by now.

2009 will NOT be the year of pagoclone, Phase IIB trials start in March, so even if the drug "works" it wont be around until 2010/2011, and even then its not a cure, it will help some sub groups, but it will not cure you.....you stop taking the pill and you still stutter just as before........only YOU can help YOU.

I am also wary of taking amino acids and affecting the delicate balance that our brains have, i.e. 5-htp or GABA without medical supervision....they may offer some temporary relief or even a placebo effect, but the brain is not a place for an amateur to be messing with.

Devices, well they may work for some, not for most and still its not a cure, its just a band-aid and you are not making any long lasting habitiual changes.

SO..........make 2009 the year for change but dont put too much pressure on yourself expecting fluency, for eloquence.....there are not many 100% fluent speakers in the world, most people have some bumbles and blips along the way, so dont beat yourself up if you slip up occasionally..........why dont you start TODAY, or TOMMOROW or Jan 2nd.....whenever suits YOU, but you must make HABITUAL changes that will last.

Breathing - start the day with breathing exercises - best thing is that its also FREE....

Resist Time Pressure - dont feel rushed to speak - also FREE !

Eye Contact - get your head up and look people in the eye - dont hide away and feel ashamed,.....it will help.....and guess what, its FREE as well !

Formulate the words in your mind before saying them and eliminate all fillers, tricks and starters, well, erms, actually's etc........

Push out your boundaries - make phonecalls to hotels/restaurants/shops and ask for things.....opening times, locations etc and the go out on the streets and ask for directions/time etc....your confidence will grow.....and yeah, this ones FREE as well.......

Turn off your computer and pick up the phone........most stutterers think that fluent people think they are stupid and that they laugh at you all the time....its not true.....most people are actually quite nice and dont care about our speech.....

Be POSITIVE......its amazing how much this will help.......if we keep whining and moaning it rubs off and the downward spiral continues......BREAK STATE and think positive......if you have a bad speaking experience, its gone, no need to keep hold of it and dwell on it.....let it go people.......

People may say, I've tried this and it does not work........you may well have tried the above or some of it, BUT for how long?.....a day...a week.....a month?......then what......lets give up and go back to my stuttering-self?........it takes commitment.....commit to it.

Have a great holiday and New Year and lets work hard at beating this thing

This is an excellent post! ;)

This is what all of us need to do to make real revolutionary changes in our lives. I hope God will help us all to do that by giving us strength, motivation and determination. That is my plan for the new year and I hope I will finally succeed very soon after many years of limited progress... :)