What would you do...?

[emily445455]

Ok so there's this guy at my school who stutters. I've heard him while I was walking in the halls last semester, and just now I overheard him a few tables down from me. I'd like to approach him and talk to him about his stuttering, but I'm not sure if I should or what I would say.

Would you approach him?

If so...what would you say?

He was with his friends, so I didn't want to say something like "Hey I noticed you stutter, I do too!" I don't know how comfortable he feels discussing his stutter, especially in front of his friends. It may be one of those situations where they all know he stutters, but no one ever talks about it.

Well...I'd like to go up to him someday and talk to him about stuttering. Mention I go to support groups here at our school if he's interested. But I'm not sure exactly how to go about it.

Advice welcome :)

[grantM]

Hmm I would do something nice like approach them and introduce yourself and simply say that you have noticed that they stutter and if they ever want someone to talk to about it then you would welcome it. They can then choose to get to know you or not.

[Bobby]

I would approach him while he is alone. If he is with his friends, he might feel embarrassed when you approach him and discuss the stutter. In the end it depends on the person.

For me personally it depends on which group of people I am with. At work I don't think anyone knows I stutter(unless they listen in on some of my phone conversations, hahaha) so I might feel a bit awkward, however with my friends I would be more then happy to talk/organise things :D

[marktb68]

Do you not think his friends know he stutters?!!!!!!!

Sure, approach him while alone but ITS NOT BECAUSE IT MIGHT EMBARRASS HIM, BUT BECAUSE YOU DON'T WANT TO INTERRUPT HIM AND HIS FRIENDS.

Stutterers are so sensitive!! God forbid one stutterer approach another. I do all the time and we strike a very good friendship from it. Share battle stories so to speak. This guy, as far you know, might feel alienated and alone.

Mark

[cjm555]

i guess i dont know what i would do... i have never came across another "like me" lol but i agree with bobby... i'd wait for a chance when he is alone and bring it up... i know it would be wierd fo rme to go up to somebody and bring it up when he is with friends... or to have somebody come up to me like that

[grantM]

i have never came across another "like me" l

True we are a hard bunch to identify outside of therapy and support groups. I remember reading that one of the greatest fears a lot of stutterers have is that of being identified as being a stutterer.

At uni I have only ever spotted one because he was a student of mine

[emily445455]

I remember reading that one of the greatest fears a lot of stutterers have is that of being identified as being a stutterer.


Wow....I wish this was my greatest fear...

[sst]

If someone who was a stutterer approached me because we both stutter, I would think it's cool. It could be a good way to make a new friend, you never know. :)

[Derek181]

i wouldnt just go up to him and say hey i stutter too..... thats kinda weird. just go and talk to him one day and stutter purposley to let him kknow u stutter as well and then you can become friends and maybe discuss it later after u know each other . but just dont "cold approach" him and say hey i noticed you stutter, i stutter as well. thats beyond weird in my opinion.

[emily445455]

i wouldnt just go up to him and say hey i stutter too..... thats kinda weird. just go and talk to him one day and stutter purposley to let him kknow u stutter as well and then you can become friends and maybe discuss it later after u know each other . but just dont "cold approach" him and say hey i noticed you stutter, i stutter as well. thats beyond weird in my opinion.

But what should I say...I never just approach random co-students and ask them how their day is or what classes they are taking....:o :confused:

[Derek181]

comment on something..... like even if its something stupid..... like weather maybe or haha . maybe crack a joke if yoru funny haha. or just randomly start up a conversation. it shouldnt be that much of an anxious situation because u know he stutters.

[grantM]

What is he is unaware that he does stutter or if he is aware then a stranger has noticed it? I am not joking. Then you would be making him aware that he does and this may be a life changing event. Many things to think about. I would welcome meeting one on campus and having a local stutter buddy

[emily445455]

What is he is unaware that he does stutter or if he is aware then a stranger has noticed it? I am not joking. Then you would be making him aware that he does and this may be a life changing event. Many things to think about. I would welcome meeting one on campus and having a local stutter buddy

Exactly...I don't want to embarrass him, esp not in front of his buddies.

Oh well...if I ever see him again I'll see what I do...

[DKoz]

It would be easier to talk about something else first like the homework or something and than perhaps bring it up later on. If you say it right away you might embarrass him.

[tb1223]

I think it depends on your personality. I've overheard 2 or 3 people stuttering in my life, but I'm a pretty introverted person so I didn't really feel like going out of my way to talk to them. I certainly wouldn't mind if someone approached me about it, though. It would probably make for an interesting discussion.

[chris2112]

I would say do it, I think it would be a nice suprise if someone in my school came up to me and said "I notice you stutter, I do too" and have someone to talk and relate to. I think It would make my day alot better haha.

[peapod]

someone did this to me, the phrase they used was "I think we have the same problem" - I suppose it is not so jarring as using the word stammer upfront, but I was a bit unsure what the other person was talking about at first, so you quickly need to explain what you mean.

Also, I was pleased they approached me about it. And, they did wait until they could say it semi-privately, away from the rest of the group.

All in all, I think you should do it.

[emily445455]

The SLP who heads the stuttering support group I attend told us about a young man who came in for a speech evaluation.....I think it's him, she said he may start coming to the meetings if he feels comfortable next semester, yay!!!