What is the worst thing about stuttering? [Archive]

freedomofspeech

06-18-2009, 01:21 AM

Jaykon

06-18-2009, 03:53 AM

its unpredictability. I hate not knowing on what or when I will stutter

GoodGuy

06-18-2009, 07:08 AM

I hate the inability to say my name normally like everyone else. I know for sure that making friends and introductions are going to be based off that, so I'm going to be screwed over.

emily445455

06-18-2009, 03:16 PM

People finishing my sentences and words for me.

mufaa

06-18-2009, 03:46 PM

Same like you, TC. When i am conversing with people, i know i could say that joke or pass that information or know that answer, but i hold back because my mind tells me i am going to stammer. I don't mind the stammering as much as the fear of getting embarrassed.

I need to be with really close friends to be myself completely. And i have few of those!

colin

06-18-2009, 10:52 PM

the worst part of stuttering : the phone. I can barely get a sentence out when I'm on the phone.

Slider

06-19-2009, 02:31 AM

The looks on other people's faces.

I second unpredictability, too. I hate that it can strike even on words and sounds you're usually fluent with.

freedomofspeech

06-19-2009, 04:37 AM

People finishing my sentences and words for me.
Yeah, that too is one thing I can't stand. And usually they finish my sentences wrong.

WhiteLatinoBoy

06-19-2009, 04:47 AM

lol ya the finishing the sentence part annoys me.
even worse when its wrong

worst part for me is that i never know how it feels like to never pause and to just have a nice flow. when i watch other people talk like on the news it is perfect and the words just come out and its just so easy.

ricardo

06-19-2009, 09:24 PM

people assuming that I don't know something because of the blocks. The pause makes them believe that I'm thinking about what to say or having doubts.

david12

06-20-2009, 03:21 PM

I guess its not knowing what people are thinking. What does stuttering sound like to someone who has never stuttered. Do i sound scared nervous stupid. I have know idea what kind of impression its giving about me

Jaykon

06-20-2009, 04:12 PM

BenLZ

06-20-2009, 06:52 PM

Not reaching your potential.

JFan

06-20-2009, 08:13 PM

Not reaching your potential.

TOTALLY AGREE!
:cool:

ForeverYoung

06-21-2009, 05:48 AM

Not being able to do a simple, effortless thing that everyone else can do and is so vital to your mental, social and emotional health that there is no way around admitting being a stutterer limits you.

Being at the mercy of the other person more than anyone else because you are so helpless when you stutter and you already dig yourself a hole socially before you even get going.

grantM

06-21-2009, 10:07 AM

Not reaching your potential.

Totally disagree.

freedomofspeech

06-21-2009, 06:46 PM

Not reaching your potential.
I believe you can always reach your potential. It may be harder than you think it should be. But I believe if you persevere and trust God, you can reach your potential.

Stamr

06-21-2009, 10:51 PM

Lets see here... haha

- Getting anxiety about have to meet new people, wondering what questions they will ask and if you will stutter... It ruins what is supposed to be a good time.

- Not being able to say what you would like to say at the very moment you would like to say it.

- People assuming I'm shy, when if they only knew that I want to talk so badly... I'm just worried about stuttering and looking stupid. Sometimes I feel like I'm ruining a conversation if I block... cause then by the time I get my awkward sentence out, everyone is already bored of the topic, or I've made them feel awkward.

- Not living to my full potential (big one)

and lastly, to tie everything in - Partially avoiding the phone, having my heart pound when it rings (sometimes)... The hot nervous, sweaty feeling when getting anxiety about stuttering, and feeling like im dumbing down the words I use when I do speak...

The list could go on. I guess I'm feeling really down about it these days. Ugh.

Penelope

06-21-2009, 10:52 PM

I agree about the potential thing. It's up to us to make sure we are all we can be in life, the same as everyone else. I actually think that stutterers, and many others with disabilities, put much more effort into being all that we can than those who appear to have all of the advantages in life. Finding something hard forces us to work out what is important and what we want and to try hard. If we have to give a presentation, we'll work at it, and it might not be as fluent as the next guy's, but the next guy might have been complacent assuming he could wing it.

I also think it's important to remember that many supposedly fluent speakers feel as if they aren't properly heard or understood. There are very bright people, with no speech impediment, who aren't naturally gifted when it comes to communication skills. Sadly, there are still many circumstances when a woman will have her idea ignored, only for the same idea to be greeted with enthusiasm when a man suggests the same thing later. Sometimes that's blatent ism on behalf of the listeners, but sometimes it's because women can be too aplogetic for our own good. It might be the confidence (possibly arrogance) that comes with the solution explained by the man that sways people.

It would be wrong to say that we don't face more obstacles than most, but it would also be wrong to assume that there aren't ways around a lot of them if we persevere.

takinyede

06-22-2009, 04:13 AM

People thinking you are incompetent because you are not speaking at all or saying something other than what you intended. The freak look. :(

Dude

07-23-2009, 08:38 AM

misunderstandings

grantM

07-23-2009, 12:56 PM

...listening to stutterers complain about public misunderstandings about stuttering yet they do nothing about it!

jack

07-23-2009, 03:43 PM

The worst thing about stuttering mmm.....

Talking on phones (or rather trying to)

Trying to tell folks my name.

Job interviews.

Trying to give directions to lost motorists.

Getting a round of drinks (although after 6 pints my stutter mysteriously disappears)

Reading aloud to people.

People mistaking my stutter for tourettes because of tics.

Combining foul language in my sentences because it helps me fluent:eek:

And finally the worst thing about my stuttering is people telling me i can still reach my full potential and acheive my goals, well i'v been left school 30 odd years now and i'm still trying!!:cool:

TK421

07-23-2009, 07:06 PM

Combining foul language in my sentences because it helps me fluent:eek:

Holy sh** me too! I don't normally curse in conversation, but if I'm really struggling on something and am around a casual crowd, slipping in an odd word or two somehow lets the rest of the sentence slide right out. I really hate it, and it has gotten me into trouble a few times. When it started to become a habit and I accidentally let it happen around my mother a couple times, I decided it was time to lay that "technique" to rest.

Anyway, the anxiety of stuttering is absolutely what I hate most about it. Recently it's just about the only thing I think about, and it really sucks living in fear. Maybe this is how it feels to always be running from the cops?

ForeverYoung

07-23-2009, 08:12 PM

- People assuming I'm shy, when if they only knew that I want to talk so badly... I'm just worried about stuttering and looking stupid. Sometimes I feel like I'm ruining a conversation if I block... cause then by the time I get my awkward sentence out, everyone is already bored of the topic, or I've made them feel awkward.

This pretty much as well.

jaissal

07-23-2009, 11:07 PM

I would say that the worst thing about stuttering is coming of as a shy person. also being a quiet person. when im fluent i talk quite a bit, really feels good to talk fluently. Even when people as me what degree i was doing this year, i always say Geography, even struggle on that word. i actually did Geography with Business. couldn't say the business part. When people as me my name, Jaissal, i always elongate the J or sometimes it just doesn't comeout.

I recently discovered that telling girls that you really fancy them is even harder than it normally would be. Thats what i'm trying to do at the moment.i keep thinking that she will say that she doesn't like me in the same way. i can't even imagine her or anyone liking me in that way.

Toney

07-25-2009, 01:30 PM

its unpredictability. I hate not knowing on what or when I will stutter

I couldn't agree more.

Sometimes I manage to say a couple of sentences without any difficulties.

Maybe I get too complacent, because by the third sentence, I start stuttering pretty badly.

CASSIOPIA

07-25-2009, 11:33 PM

Hi Toney. I tried to send you a message but your box is full. Thanks for your reply today. We have just returned from Starfish today, My daughter really enjoyed it. She met lots of old friends and also made some new (while also working on her speech) Have you thought anymore about ringing Anne? I know they have some places left in either October or November. Hope you choose to go, I think it could really help you. If you still cant decide you could ring Anne anyway (she really would be happy to hear from you) and ask for more info. Take care.

kodiak

07-26-2009, 04:31 AM

To pick one thing it would have to be that people don't think you are sure or confident about what you are talking about.

Toney

07-26-2009, 09:05 PM

Thanx Cass

Check your pm's.

freeflow918

07-28-2009, 04:01 AM

The lack of internal control in social situations, the feeling that other people are controlling me. The feeling of not being in charge of your life and being misunderstood.

This really pisses me off

nerrad

07-28-2009, 06:28 AM

People finishing my sentences and words for me.

I might have to do this tomorrow at drivers ed and I'm freaking out. And then at the end of August when school opens up again, I'll have to do it again. WHY! The worst thing about stuttering is not being able to be fluent like your average person. Because of it, when have to work our WHOLE lives around it making our lives not as full as they could be.

elliejelly

07-28-2009, 10:27 AM

oh dude where do I begin xD

one would be not being able to present a laboratory report at uni - i get marked on my verbal communication skills - which I have to say is pretty bull as I am marked down because I can't "communicate effectively" *sigh*

i agree with the person who said the look on people's faces. I picked up on this little thing a long time ago, and part of that is what makes me so anxious to speak in the first place! Though now, because I am so used to reading people's faces to gauge their emotions about me - this has turned into a pretty good trick for me in determining if someone is trying to lie to me :D i'm no human lie detector of course hehe so out of stuttering comes a skill I would have othewise never gained:p

the worst thing for me about stuttering - finding it extremely difficult to find work - especially when every job I seem to apply for insists on excellent communication skills *eeep*

DKoz

07-28-2009, 08:34 PM

The stress and unpredictability that comes with stuttering.

Gunars

08-09-2009, 12:00 AM

The worst thing about stuttering is when a person gives up hope that he can stutter less and less severely by finding the proper therapy for him.
Gunars

Thecoherentman

08-10-2009, 10:41 AM

The worst thing about stuttering is when a person gives up hope that he can stutter less and less severely by finding the proper therapy for him.
Gunars

The worst thing about stuttering is that therapists oppress you and expect you to show that their therapies are useful. They say the Religion is good. It is the people who follow that are not fanatic enough.

I say go to therapist and pay him money, because he must live. Then throw the repressive practices he thought you out of the window, because you must live also.

BenLZ

08-10-2009, 04:47 PM

I would say that the false hope and failure from therapists really, really hurts but there's worse.

Worse would be the loss of self. I can't be myself with a severe/moderate stutter, I need to hold back. If I said everything that was on my mind it would be unfair for the listener, and I don't even know if he would understand it. And just in terms of getting quick jokes in on time - it doesn't happen. I've really been pressed to my soul here, and its getting really hard to handle. Seriously, take my legs, take my arms, but don't take MY SOUL. Don't steal my personality.

ShyMichael

08-10-2009, 04:49 PM

People finishing my sentences and words for me.

CoffeeCzar

08-10-2009, 06:43 PM

MojoRizen

08-11-2009, 08:52 PM

If you had to pick just one thing. What would you say is the worst thing about stuttering to you?
For me it would probably not being able to say exactly what I want to say and come across how I would like.
Because as I tell people sometimes I feel like an extrovert living in a introvert's body. Any opinions would be greatly appreciated.

I hate the whole experience, from top to bottom. When I was in the military, it really complicated my life. There were times when people treated me as though I was stupid. That bothered me, a lot.

Thecoherentman

08-11-2009, 11:05 PM

Realizing that when I am a physician and I have to prescribe a medication to a patient who has their trust in me, I may not be able to say the name of the medication.

Also, sometimes not being able to say my own name.

Dear Dr.

Laughter is extremely healthy for any patient with any problem as it reduces the stress hormone and improves immunity. So, by stuttering on the name of the medication you can give extra help to your patients even if the drug is not exactly right.

There is a phrase that any stutterer can say it fluently any time, namely "I can't say it" Use it in place of your name when needed (this is joke but say it fast enough it may pass as your name. some people have done it and it has been accepted.)

Now serious: Being a DR. is an office above self. So forget about any disrespect to your self because of your stuttering. Just do the Dr. work as good as you can do. When you are acting as Dr. it must not be about you, but it must be about the patient.

MojoRizen

08-14-2009, 11:33 PM

I struggled for 50 years with my speech-block, without understanding it, much less getting help for it. I also put myself in a professional situation in which I couldn't seek any kind of psychological therapy, by regulation. So, over the course of half a century, my condition grew the biggest anxiety disorder witin my psyche one can imagine. It took a nervous breakdown to force me to seek help, regardless of professional consequences. The crisis itself was the single worst thing I've ever experienced.

DekHog

08-17-2009, 02:21 PM

The worst thing about stuttering is the FEAR of stuttering... which invariably makes you stutter, and so the circle goes on....

McGilicuty

08-18-2009, 06:48 AM

DekHog

08-18-2009, 07:42 PM

that my child also stutters.

I went through life ok. I dealt with the embarrassment of having words finished, parents saying I'm lying ("'Duh, duh', TELL ME THE TRUTH"), reading in class, ect. I dealt. and did ok with it considering...

but now I see Seth going through the same problems I had and it breaks my heart.

That must be heartbreaking - is he going to speech therapy or anything? Best catch it as soon as possible, as we all know it verges on the impossible to control the older you get... luckily my three are non-stammerers - I often tell them to be quiet, but then remember how lucky they are to be in the position to be told that anyway...

McGilicuty

08-19-2009, 04:03 PM

That must be heartbreaking - is he going to speech therapy or anything? Best catch it as soon as possible, as we all know it verges on the impossible to control the older you get... luckily my three are non-stammerers - I often tell them to be quiet, but then remember how lucky they are to be in the position to be told that anyway...

When he was in public school I suggested it but they 'didn't see the need, since his stutter wasn't bad'...yeah. He now goes to a private school ;)

and while he truly isn't a bad stutterer, I have been looking into programs. There aren't many around here that offer therapy outside of school programs, and the PS he goes to doesn't offer it.

kobe4three

08-20-2009, 01:10 AM

the worst thing for me is i cant approach women when their interested in me...man i missed out on some BEAUTIFUL women :(

ForeverYoung

08-21-2009, 12:38 AM

I also don't really like how it turns you into a blabbering idiot when you aren't and gives everyone a terrible first impression of you.

ecurtis

08-21-2009, 06:33 AM

the confusion it causes in a conversation. another thing that really annoys me is the question "Are you All Right?"

munoz18

08-22-2009, 02:24 AM

Not reaching your potential.

you can always reach your potential

agantx

08-23-2009, 09:41 PM

If you had to pick just one thing. What would you say is the worst thing about stuttering to you?
For me it would probably not being able to say exactly what I want to say and come across how I would like.
Because as I tell people sometimes I feel like an extrovert living in a introvert's body. Any opinions would be greatly appreciated.

For me it's the lack of control and being not understood by some people or at least a strong fear of not being understood since many people in the past simply didn't understand me no matter how hard I tried. Hopefully my situation will change for the better...

Pheonixphire

08-26-2009, 10:28 PM

Getting talked over when in a conversation with a group of people, like they're too impatient to let you finish.

mike615

09-01-2009, 12:01 AM

waking up every morning knowing that you do stutter

Curt

09-01-2009, 08:00 AM

I would have to say the worst parts for me are:

- the unpredictability (as has been mentioned a few times)
- not being able to convey my true personality
- the moment when I am stuttering... thinking in my head how long this one is going to last... the look on people's face... wondering what they are thinking in that moment as well.

pt9

09-02-2009, 02:34 AM

not being able to say exactly what you want when you want to.

prg5001

09-02-2009, 12:20 PM

All the things I want to say but don't because I might stutter.

Worse still is when I do say what I want to and then find it wasn't worth saying.

Hmmm. Maybe sometimes the stutter stops me from saying so many stupid things. LOL.

beaul

09-03-2009, 03:58 AM

I have trouble using the phone, particurarly if it is to someone I don't know.
And the other end laughs at you before you can explain yourself.
I could KILL that person if I could get to them.

Business people try and take advantage of me because I must be sub normal, if I stutter.

freedomofspeech

09-03-2009, 04:16 AM

sarath

09-03-2009, 02:21 PM

i am so much fear to take when i am anxiety..when i start to spoke to any any body anxiety and fear play a majar role for my stutter.so how to stop this..

prg5001

09-04-2009, 12:57 AM

i am so much fear to take when i am anxiety..when i start to spoke to any any body anxiety and fear play a majar role for my stutter.so how to stop this..

not easy but I think the first step is to acknowledge the fear, acknowledge the anxiety and then carry on and talk anyway.

then afterwards praise yourself that even though you were scared, even though you were anxious, you still talked. nice one.

i find that slowly, the fear and anxiety give up and move on and it becomes a little easier each time. don't push too much too soon but keep the direction.