Stuttering and relationships

[Lookin4ACure]

Hello everyone,

I just recently got out of a 6 year relationship, I'm 21 years old with a beautiful 2 year old baby girl. When I met my ex, I would say my fluency was much better than it is now. As of now I'm blocking every 3 words... it's pretty frustrating, I would consider myself a severe stutterer.

She was pretty understanding about it, and did not seem to mind at all. I really commended her for this, because even as I stutterer, I could not see how anyone could want to be with someone who stutters... Maybe it's the stutter that made me this way, in fact I know it is. It has definitely shaped the way I view the world.

I recently met someone whom I have taken quite an interest in, as she has in me. The problem is, every time we've met, it has been in a party atmosphere, i.e loud music, dancing, alcohol. And of course when all these are present, fluency is greatly improved. The loud music makes it so you have to yell to be heard, improving fluency. The alcohol lowers inhibitions, improving fluency.

We've been keeping in touch for the past week through text messages, which by the way are one of the greatest inventions ever made.. lol..
We seem pretty interested in each other, and I let her know right away that I stutter. She says it's absolutely no problem and she doesn't care.... The problem is, I don't think she realizes how bad it really is..

I'm pretty nervous, I feel like a little kid again going on a first date lol...
My fear isn't that she won't like me, my fear is that she won't like my stutter.
And although I won't be heart broken at the fact she's not interested anymore (wasn't really looking for anything anyway, after getting out of a 6 year relationship...), I know it will have a heavy impact on my self-esteem and on how I view myself, as well as what I'm capable of doing and achieving.

I'm pretty much alone in all this... and this is the first time I ever really vented about it. I must say it feels pretty good... If anyone has any advice it would be greatly appreciated...

Thank you,

Lookin4ACure

[amey]

I am sure you are a great person and she will see that. As stutterers, we think we know how people feel about our stuttering. We project how we feel about it on to other people. The truth is that we cannot read minds! :)
Give this girl a chance. Give YOURSELF a chance. Go for IT!-- When you talk to her, throw in a comment about your stuttering. This is not shameful, it is just the truth.---- Give her a call. You can DO IT!!!!!!

[jaissal]

Hey, i can understand. i am seeing this girl at the moment, and even tho i have a mild stammer, she doesn't really take notice of it....which is very pleasing. I remember a week ago, we were ordering drinks at a pub, and i stuttered a little, and she said nothing about it. i have already told her about my stammer. This girl could be my first girlfriend soon. i am 20 by the way. hope things work out for you with this girl.