So sick of this

[Jp72394]

I've been on a journey all this time, trying to accept my stutter, bring it more into the open, but I hate this feeling. I HATE THIS, and i'm sure alot of you hate this feeling too. I'm taking driving classes right now, and we don't have to do much talking, but when we do, its to answer questions to quizzes we answered, and he called on you randomly. I just sit there, terrified out of my mind, after each name you're glad it wasn't you, but as he starts on the next name, you're terrified there too, terrified of looking like an idiot infront of everyone, terrified of them laughing at you. If it wasn't for that one feeling, I could handle stuttering, but I don't think that feeling is healthy, all that mental overload...what are your experiences with this?

[amey]

I've been on a journey all this time, trying to accept my stutter, bring it more into the open, but I hate this feeling. I HATE THIS, and i'm sure alot of you hate this feeling too. I'm taking driving classes right now, and we don't have to do much talking, but when we do, its to answer questions to quizzes we answered, and he called on you randomly. I just sit there, terrified out of my mind, after each name you're glad it wasn't you, but as he starts on the next name, you're terrified there too, terrified of looking like an idiot infront of everyone, terrified of them laughing at you. If it wasn't for that one feeling, I could handle stuttering, but I don't think that feeling is healthy, all that mental overload...what are your experiences with this?

I hear you. I remeber those days. Everyone on this site can relate to your experience, you are not alone in this.--- For me, the ONLY way out of these feelings was to live my life as an open stutterer. I can not change my behavior because of fear. It is not easy, but is actually the easier way in the end. I know it is so hard, but show your stuttering more. The more you do this, the easier it becomes.-- good luck!

[dream431ca]

I've had moments like that. Especially in School. It feels like your on death row, and the executioner is randomly picking people. It's tough to get through, but it's worth it in the end. My advice is, don't worry about it so much. In my experience, most people don't really care if you stutter. It was me who was worrying so much about my stutter that your mind starts going through scenarios of what might happen if your picked and you have to speak. If you really do get picked and you have to speak, just take your time.

[Asgb]

Read this post.


I just watched a stutterer on television wich got me to think how thankful i am that i got out of it. Therefore i wanted to give something back to you guys who still stutter, i dont know what information thats out there but i hope this can be of value.

I wont bore you with my history, ill just tell you that ive stuttered since i was 6 until i was 15. Im 18 now and speak fluidly, i still do it from time to time but nothing more than anyone else and when i do never even think about it. It doesent matter if youre 20 or 35 and still stutter, age doesent matter. You just need more time because your whole identity is based around it. And im swedish btw so dont bother if some sentences might be a little hard to get =)

Some things im about to say can seem a little bit wierd and hard to understand, if you just trust what im saying and read it open mindedly then you will be able to progress. If i could just fit the pieces of the puzzle in your head so you get out of that mindset and see it from my point of view i know you will be able to take steps in the right direction.

Stuttering is ALL in YOUR mind. Its not something physical in you that cant be changed. I have moments where when someone brings it up, say in my family, and as soon as i start to think about it it just bubbles up and sort of my "old self" comes back. And then i can sometimes start to stutter again but when it does, im just thinking its all in my head and nothing more, and all of that is gone.

Its like you know you can say those words, but your mind wont let you. Remember that you are not your mind, as soon as your mind gets the evidence that its all in your head, you can get out if it.

You know when you have sort of periods where some days youre a mad stutterer and some other day you stutter less and sometimes not at all? Think about those days where you stuttered less. A 100% of the time you didnt think about your stutter as much as you did on the days of more stuttering. Now did you think about your stuttering less because you stuttered less or did you stutter less because you thought about it less? ;)


Think about it


Remember that your mind (subconcious or whatever you would like to call it) cant tell the difference between your thoughts and what is real. So therefore if you constantly think about you being a stutterer, you are a stutterer. And when you accept that you stutter, you wont think about it, because you accepted it right? Its all about tricking your mind because thats whats holding you back. For those of you who have tried benzos or alcohol, you didnt stutter when you where intoxicated. Why? Your mind gets temporarily numbed and you dont think as much, you are more in the moment. On the side i can recommend meditation for stopping you thinking and getting you in the moment, and this takes practice.

So when youre out in the real world and you stutter your friends might point it out, strangers may point it out, when you go to therapeutics and doctors to talk about it and they points it out even more, they confirm that youre a stutterer and your mind gets even more evidence that youre a stutterer. Even hanging around here points it out to yourself. You form an entire identity out of it. You need to give your mind evidence that youre the same as everyone else, that you can say whatever you want whenever you want.

Then what do you do when you want to get your mind that evidence?
You know how you stop stuttering when you sing, read out loud or mimic someone?

Think of someone you want to be, say a friend, and emulate him or her when youre talking to lets say a stranger, just for fun. Just act as if you were that person. Do this from time to time, whenever you feel like it. Play around with it. When i did this i would magicly stop stuttering, and it gets you out of your head. This is what made me think in these directions, and in the end got me to stop stuttering.

What ive written here and what anyones written here wont make you stop stuttering, pills or alcohol wont make you stop stuttering, going to a doctor wont make you stop stuttering. Its YOU and only YOU who can make the change. There is no magic pill.

Ive written this to get you thinking in the right direction. Changing yourself takes time. I am absolutely 100% SURE that if you have the right mindset and surround yourself with the right people you can take massive steps and speak completely normal in a year or maybe even 6 months. And the beautiful thing about it is that its permanent.

You are not cut from a different cloth than a person who can speak fluidly, you look the same, you are just as intelligent. This is not downs syndrome or any physical handicap we are talking about here, it is JUST IN YOUR HEAD GUYS. You can change it.

And dont strive for perfection, everyone stutters from time to time.

So as a summary, you have to understand that there is nothing physical that is stopping you from talking, YOU stop yourself. With learning how your mind works and enough willpower you will get it.

I know its tough, ive been there myself for almost all my life. Just be in the moment and stop caring.

Thanks

[N9NEstein]

dude this is what you do...it works EVERYTIME for me, for the shitt your talking about, classes etc...

but before you actually have the class just talk to the intructor and ask for about 5 min...and then go up and explain your stutter...BUT

you have to explain it in the right way...you have to EMPHASIZE over and over again that ALL it is, is your brain telling your mouth to move the wrong way to produce voicing....THAT IS ALL IT IS...is simply your inability to get the thoughts from your brain and have your mouth/throat move correctly...THATS IT!! NOTHING ELSE...so doesnt at all effect intelligence, etc...(then say something like your a straight A student even though you may not be)

Say that it is a nuerological DISORDER and that the reason its NOT because im nervous, or because i dont have CONFIDENCE in myself...you have to say this w distinction, to show them that it angers you when people do grow those conclusions...

And then after you explain it for a while you have to end by saying that you are just as normal as everyone else so to speak... Say this, this ALWAYS works for me, it gets ppl to come up to ME, wanting to be MY freind/ girlfreind..."It can be very frustrating to have this disorder because ppl think you are wierd or different or even mentally RETARDED and they shy away from you...(say this part kind of as a joke, or w a smile) "I am a nice, normal, guy, who happens to have this disorder and would love to get to know you ppl"

Also you will find that speeches, when the topic is Stuttering itself, become alot easier...like ALOT easier...youll be able to fluently say most of the stuff, once you get past the begiging nerves

[angeldust]

I really feel for you. I was laughed at in primary school so in high school there was no way anyone would ever laugh at me again, so I always spoke to the teachers and told them about my stutter, they were always really nice and told me that I didn't have to do anything that made me feel uncomfortable. It did affect my grade a little but saved me the embarrassment of stuttering in front of the whole class. Then when I started working, if I ever had to make phone calls, I would find a conference room and make them from there, if I was going to stutter I didn't want anyone to hear me. Then there was the training courses, oh my gosh, don't you love it when they say "let's go around the room and introduce ourselves etc", well I always nearly used to pass out. I got through it, stutter and all but I did it. I would suggest to anyone who feels uncomfortable to just speak to the teacher/training instructor and explain your position. We never have to be in a position that we feel will belittle us. Good luck with it all :)