Concern over speaking to young children

AstralMystic · 01-17-2009, 05:24 AM

I never once worried about this until today. It has never really posed a problem. This afternoon however, I got into the front door of my building at the exact same time as my neighbor, who had four young children with her. I was checking my main in the front entrance, when the littlest of them, probably about four of five, asked me what my name is, while the lady unlocked the building door. Now, the poor little guy got nothing in response but a bunch or rather graceless and awkward sounding noise. I really tried, but it just didn't work. I worry I might have scared him or something. I hope I have not upset my neighbor, or of course those children. You would think that most people would be at least somewhat aware of stuttering... but a four year old? At that age they are still not aware of everything hat is out there. He might have simply thought I was being funny, I'm hoping. Anyone else ever stuttered while speaking to a very small child? I would have to assume it's not uncommon. I mean who does not ever deal with children, lol. In your dealings with this kind of thing, what the heck do you do?

grantM · 01-17-2009, 06:03 AM

Hmm I stutter fairly consistently around differently aged people. Kids though are very inquisitive and very honest. They are also normally very quickly accepting I find. Maybe talk to your neighbour about the situation so they know you are not some sort of weirdo. I think once explained to he children all will be fine and they will be totally accepting of it

emily445455 · 01-17-2009, 02:39 PM

I worked at a daycare for a long time (was with 3-5 yr olds) and use to stutter a lot in front of the kids. Most of them just waited patiently for me to finish what I was saying.

Sometimes if I was reading a story and would get stuck on a certain word some of them would say things like "you get stuck there"...but it didn't bother them either way.

Kids are amazingly understanding and flexible at that age.

cjm555 · 01-17-2009, 04:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by emily445455

I worked at a daycare for a long time (was with 3-5 yr olds) and use to stutter a lot in front of the kids. Most of them just waited patiently for me to finish what I was saying.

Sometimes if I was reading a story and would get stuck on a certain word some of them would say things like "you get stuck there"...but it didn't bother them either way.

Kids are amazingly understanding and flexible at that age.

yes they are! my twin sisters (4 years old) dont seem to care either way. but then my sister next (7 years old) is a pain in the *** like any other 7 year old and tries to guess. my oldest sister (16 years old) knows whats up.. she'll throw out sarcastic comments every now and then but i deserve it... i'm a very sarcastic person.

and yes... my parents only had 1 boy , me, and 4 girls... i'm just glad i'm out of the house before they all hit that "maturing" age lol

JDRow · 01-17-2009, 05:17 PM

I watch my sister's kids a lot, and I stutter around them. Sometimes a lot, sometimes not much, but they definitely hear me stutter. She has four kids, and the older three have all asked me at one point, when they got old enough to notice, why I talk the way I do. I just said that I stutter, and I can't help it, and they seemed to understand. Once in a while one of them will mention it, but not that often. My one niece, when she was 4 and 5, used to tell me "that was a big stuck" when I would have a bad block, but she grew out of doing that and none of the others mention it very often. One of my brothers has kids, too, but he doesn't like me talking to them because I guess he thinks stuttering's contagious.

agantx · 01-17-2009, 06:20 PM

One of my big fears is talking with little children because I stutter a lot most of the time. This fear is made worse because in the past many people didn’t understand me no matter how hard I tried to be understood.

At this point in my life it seems impossible for me to overcome this illogical fear. But I’m confident that with a lot of hard work and determination I’ll overcome it along with all my fears.

JDRow · 01-17-2009, 07:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Power of three

And if asked why you talk funny, just say that special people talk that way.

I probably wouldn't say that, just because it's not really an honest answer, and I think that could be confusing for kids. I mean, if a child asked why somebody was in a wheelchair, I would think "Because special people use wheelchairs" might be confusing. I think even small kids, if they're old enough to ask the question, can understand that some people have trouble walking, and so need wheelchairs. I think they can also understand that some people have trouble talking.

Maybe some of it depends on the age of the kid. My nieces and nephews have asked me about it when they were young, like 4-6, and they were just genuinely curious, and not trying to be jerks, so I think they deserved an honest answer.

grantM · 01-17-2009, 08:41 PM

Kids are inquisitive and once they are told in general they would probably not batter an eyelid over you stuttering again. Ahh to be a kid again

happy7117 · 01-18-2009, 01:55 AM

My solution:

Ignore the kid and pretend you didn't hear them, and go about your business.

Hey, that's a great idea. I should start playing deaf when people make a mean remark about me or my stuttering.

If people want to ask me a question, and I have a shitty stuttering day which is always, I'll just ignore them.

Just because I ignore a person doesn't mean I'm rude or anti-social-it's to save the trouble of stuttering.

Count · 01-18-2009, 01:58 PM

I've never spoken to little children so far. Might sound strange, but it's the truth.
I even stutter when talking to my cat.

peebee · 01-18-2009, 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by happy7117

My solution:

Ignore the kid and pretend you didn't hear them, and go about your business.

Hey, that's a great idea. I should start playing deaf when people make a mean remark about me or my stuttering.

If people want to ask me a question, and I have a shitty stuttering day which is always, I'll just ignore them.

Just because I ignore a person doesn't mean I'm rude or anti-social-it's to save the trouble of stuttering.

sounds anti-social and rude to me

emily445455 · 01-18-2009, 07:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by peebee

sounds anti-social and rude to me

Ditto.

...too short....

JDRow · 01-18-2009, 11:25 PM

Also, even if you aren't intending to be anti-social and rude, that's how other people are going to perceive you. It was a big wake-up to me when I realized that a lot of other people thought I was rude or a jerk, or a rude jerk, because of how I acted around them. I wasn't trying to be rude, but ignoring people and not talking to them when they are trying to involve you in a conversation is rude. I realized that I'd rather have people know I was a stutterer than think I was an asshole.

Adrian · 01-19-2009, 02:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JDRow

One of my brothers has kids, too, but he doesn't like me talking to them because I guess he thinks stuttering's contagious.

JD, I hope you don't mind me saying this, but your brother sounds like an ignorant jerk. What he can't take five minutes to read up on stuttering on the internet and find his view are wrong? Well I guess I can't blame him though, some people on this very group are ignorant enough to believe this kind of nonsense. I hope one day this insanity will stop.

grantM · 01-19-2009, 04:53 AM

Hey 5% of children stutter any how, only 1% continue on to adulthood

01-17-2009, 05:24 AM	#1
AstralMystic Stuttering Forum Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Western Canada Posts: 50	Concern over speaking to young children I never once worried about this until today. It has never really posed a problem. This afternoon however, I got into the front door of my building at the exact same time as my neighbor, who had four young children with her. I was checking my main in the front entrance, when the littlest of them, probably about four of five, asked me what my name is, while the lady unlocked the building door. Now, the poor little guy got nothing in response but a bunch or rather graceless and awkward sounding noise. I really tried, but it just didn't work. I worry I might have scared him or something. I hope I have not upset my neighbor, or of course those children. You would think that most people would be at least somewhat aware of stuttering... but a four year old? At that age they are still not aware of everything hat is out there. He might have simply thought I was being funny, I'm hoping. Anyone else ever stuttered while speaking to a very small child? I would have to assume it's not uncommon. I mean who does not ever deal with children, lol. In your dealings with this kind of thing, what the heck do you do?

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01-17-2009, 06:03 AM	#2
grantM Stuttering Forum Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Western Vic, Victoria, Australia Posts: 783	Hmm I stutter fairly consistently around differently aged people. Kids though are very inquisitive and very honest. They are also normally very quickly accepting I find. Maybe talk to your neighbour about the situation so they know you are not some sort of weirdo. I think once explained to he children all will be fine and they will be totally accepting of it

01-17-2009, 02:39 PM	#3
emily445455 Stuttering Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Ohio Posts: 1,167	I worked at a daycare for a long time (was with 3-5 yr olds) and use to stutter a lot in front of the kids. Most of them just waited patiently for me to finish what I was saying. Sometimes if I was reading a story and would get stuck on a certain word some of them would say things like "you get stuck there"...but it didn't bother them either way. Kids are amazingly understanding and flexible at that age.

01-17-2009, 05:17 PM	#5
JDRow Stuttering Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Southeast MI Posts: 515	I watch my sister's kids a lot, and I stutter around them. Sometimes a lot, sometimes not much, but they definitely hear me stutter. She has four kids, and the older three have all asked me at one point, when they got old enough to notice, why I talk the way I do. I just said that I stutter, and I can't help it, and they seemed to understand. Once in a while one of them will mention it, but not that often. My one niece, when she was 4 and 5, used to tell me "that was a big stuck" when I would have a bad block, but she grew out of doing that and none of the others mention it very often. One of my brothers has kids, too, but he doesn't like me talking to them because I guess he thinks stuttering's contagious.

01-17-2009, 06:20 PM	#6
agantx Stuttering Forum Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: hhh Posts: 182	One of my big fears is talking with little children because I stutter a lot most of the time. This fear is made worse because in the past many people didn’t understand me no matter how hard I tried to be understood. At this point in my life it seems impossible for me to overcome this illogical fear. But I’m confident that with a lot of hard work and determination I’ll overcome it along with all my fears.

01-17-2009, 08:41 PM	#8
grantM Stuttering Forum Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Western Vic, Victoria, Australia Posts: 783	Kids are inquisitive and once they are told in general they would probably not batter an eyelid over you stuttering again. Ahh to be a kid again

01-18-2009, 01:55 AM	#9
happy7117 Stuttering Forum Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: NY Posts: 2,357	My solution: Ignore the kid and pretend you didn't hear them, and go about your business. Hey, that's a great idea. I should start playing deaf when people make a mean remark about me or my stuttering. If people want to ask me a question, and I have a shitty stuttering day which is always, I'll just ignore them. Just because I ignore a person doesn't mean I'm rude or anti-social-it's to save the trouble of stuttering.

01-18-2009, 01:58 PM	#10
Count Stuttering Forum Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Germany Posts: 295	I've never spoken to little children so far. Might sound strange, but it's the truth. I even stutter when talking to my cat.

01-18-2009, 11:25 PM	#13
JDRow Stuttering Forum Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Southeast MI Posts: 515	Also, even if you aren't intending to be anti-social and rude, that's how other people are going to perceive you. It was a big wake-up to me when I realized that a lot of other people thought I was rude or a jerk, or a rude jerk, because of how I acted around them. I wasn't trying to be rude, but ignoring people and not talking to them when they are trying to involve you in a conversation is rude. I realized that I'd rather have people know I was a stutterer than think I was an asshole.

01-19-2009, 04:53 AM	#15
grantM Stuttering Forum Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Western Vic, Victoria, Australia Posts: 783	Hey 5% of children stutter any how, only 1% continue on to adulthood

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